Top four! America's in charge! Cat Deeley! With her hair swept up underneath in a vaguely Trump-ian swoop I don't entirely approve of but whatever! Fourth judge Tyce Diorio! Wow, things have really gone downhill in this paragraph. Seriously, So You Think You Can Dance, WHERE is my Debbie Allen?? I can't go a whole season without her! Who will make sure that someone calls the fire department (honey)?

First up is a group routine with all four remaining contestants -- Kent, Robert, Lauren, and Adechike -- choreographed by ... ugh, Tyce. It's a Broadway routine set to something from Guys & Dolls. I've never seen that show, but it's always struck me like every high-school production you ever saw. The ones where they have to entice the boys to audition so it's all about gangsters and guns. The choreography involves a lot of passing Lauren around (in mostly non-creepy ways), and a lot of the usual Tyce flourishes that ultimately don't connect to anything else. There is one maneuver I quite like, where Kent and Adechike lift Lauren up into an iron cross, and then Robert passes underneath her like a car in a car wash, swooping her legs up behind her. It ends up looking like she's flying. But overall, this isn't nearly as dynamic as a Top 4 group routine should be. Damn it, Tyce. Afterwards, Tyce critiques his own routine, saying Kent stood out and he wants to see Adechike fighting more. The latter will be a theme.

Lauren is paired with Pasha for a tango, choreographed by Mirian Larici and Leonardo Baarrionuevo. "Steamy" is the watchword from rehearsal, but the word I keep coming to as I watch the performance is "stark." The stage setup, choreography, and performance styles of both dancers seem darkly atmospheric and desperate -- in a very good way. There's a last-call, come-home-with-me vibe to Lauren and Pasha that is incredibly sensual. Loooove this. Probably my favorite ballroom of the season. Nigel loved Lauren's passion, du-hoy, but he also gets rather tongue-tied on the subject of Pasha, coming as close as he ever has to admitting he'd totally do it with the Russian sex-bomb. We all would, Nigel. (And fuck you, Scott Pilgrim for making me almost type "sex bob-omb" just then. Fuck you in your effortful face.) Mia tells Lauren she just became a woman, and calls the routine voyeuristic" (yes!). Adam takes a moment to give props to today's court ruling striking down Prop 8 (WHOOP!) ... and then asks Nigel to marry him. Oh, Adam. You can do better.

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