Sabra and Neil are the first couple, doing a Shane Sparks hip-hop routine, and he calls Sabra and Neil the perfect two to do it. Because when you think "hip-hop," you think "Neil." Shane says Sabra brings the sexuality, and all the danceability he needs. Neil, on the other hand, doesn't have the sexuality. Neil, apparently, disagrees. "Shane was asking me to be all sexy and stuff? And I was like, 'Shane. That's like asking Nigel to be British.'" Heh.
They're dancing to "Whine Up" by Kat DeLuna. They put the hop in hip-hop to start with. Sabra lies on the floor and Neil does a flip right over top of her. Other than that though, it seems a little generic, or maybe I'm finally getting hip-hopped out.
Nigel says he's not sure it was all that sexy. "It wasn't as funky as I'd have liked it," and he says Neil was a little stiff. He was also expecting Sabra to be "really down there and hittin' it," and says it wasn't as strong as he'd expected. He gets booed. Mary agrees, saying it wasn't as hard-hitting as it should have been. She also gets booed. Dan makes it unanimous, saying they've danced better hip-hop before, and called it bouncy. I have a hard time figuring out how much of this criticism is for the routine itself, or for the dancers. The one reaction shot of Shane, he's got his hat pulled down low over his inscrutable-as-always face.
Next up: Lacey and Danny, doing Jean-Marc Genereux's Viennese waltz. He says this was traditionally danced for the king and queen by the "chosen ones," and then says, "This is no different." It really is different, Jean-Marc. Lacey talks about how she and Danny are friends, and have inside jokes, and then get too busy talking to each other to listen to Jean-Marc, and then make fun of his French accent. Then they speak gibberish, pretending that it's French. Also, Lacey hits Danny in the crotch with her head.
They're dancing to "Keep Holding On," by Avril Lavigne, a song that has also featured prominently in the non-stop manipulationathon commercials for Fox's new K-Ville. It's about New Orleans, y'all, so if it doesn't succeed, it's because television viewers are racist assholes who hate America. Danny and Lacey do a lovely job, with nice lifts, and fortunately Lacey's slide through Danny's legs doesn't, this time, affect his ability to produce children.
Nigel says it was so good that they could have been dancing on ice. Lacey apparently lost an earring. Then Nigel asks about how much she listened to his advice about her dead hand, and Lacey says that when she watched that again, she actually "vomited" and then she talks about putting a popsicle stick in her glove to fix that, and then Danny says she's lying, and everybody laughs forever, and then Cat says "we're having a domestic." Nigel is also full of praise for Danny.