MONDO EXTRAS

I can see why the tourists adore him.

Back to the warehouse! They found the guns! Yay! Let's get out of here! Jax is of course having some trouble setting up the professional grade explosives, and Clay is all impatient and disapproving, but there's no time for that now! A noisy muscle car has pulled up outside and Clay says, "Gotta be the Mayans." Another thing I've never understood about gang members -- why not use stealthier cars? That engine just screams rival gang.

Clay and Jax go to check out the muscle car, which is occupied by two whole Mayans. Jax wants to run and avoid a violent confrontation, but Clay basically calls him a candy ass and says he came to send a message. I hate to admit it, but I'm with Jax on this one.

Anyway, Jax dons a blanket and creates a diversion, stumbling up to the Mayans pretending to be a drunk homeless man. The Mayans start taunting the pandejo borracho, and Clay sneaks up and shoots one of them in the throat, saying that's what happens when you steal from the Sons. Then he leaves Jax with the other Mayan, saying "He's all yours." Wouldn't you want to keep that guy alive so he could deliver the message to his fellow gang members? No wonder Jax questions Clay's leadership. The Mayan gets on his knees and starts praying in Spanish, which makes Jax hesitate because he can't do anything right. Out of nowhere, some new guy emerges from behind a dumpster, shooting Jax in the back twice, which is cool because he's wearing a vest. Jax rolls onto his back and shoots dumpster man a couple times. Clay then rapid fires on the praying Mayan, and that hombre is dead and dead! He then tells Jax to "Finish it" with the dumpster guy, who is lying face down on the pavement, dying, and really grumbling about it. Jax protests, saying it's already finished, even though it clearly is not, and Clay looks at him like he doesn't even know him anymore. Then Braveheart Scar runs up all upset about the carnage, but he's ignored. They examine dead dumpster man and realize he is one of Skinner's men, which means Skinner is now in cahoots with the Mexicans. Which is weird, because he's a Nazi, but hey, business is business, right? He's got the drugs, they've got the muscle. It's a partnership made in crime drama heaven! They stuff the two Mayans and Skinner's boy in a car in the warehouse and blow it to hell, but not before sticking one seriously hilarious stick of dynamite in dumpster man's butt. Ha! Good one! And they're off!

Back from commercial! Abel's surgery is over, and boy does tramp stamp doctor Tara look tired. Gemma goes into Wendy's hospital room and warmly tells her that her son is going to make it. Then she suggests they say a nice prayer together, which quickly turns into Katey Sagal praying to God that Abel is saved from his murderous junkie whore mother. It's a great zing and all, but Katey Sagal's just so adorable I just wanna go, "C'mere, you!" every time she tries to be menacing. This could just be me, but she has a warmth she can't really hide, even when she's calling a distraught mother a murderous junkie whore. Anyway, Wendy's all like, "It's different this time! I can clean up!" And Gemma grabs her by the throat and is all like, you come near that kid and I'll kill you, and walks out, suggesting she turn to Jesus. Wendy opens her bible to find that Gemma has slipped a fully stocked syringe of crank inside, and starts sobbing uncontrollably. Yeah, how different is it this time now, crackie?

Jax is at the hospital now, where he runs into tramp stamp doctor Tara in an empty hallway. They happily embrace over his son surviving the surgery and seriously look like they're going to make out when she notices the blood all over him and gets this look on her face like she totally knows it's not his blood. She pushes him away and tells him to clean himself up, and "I Can't Help Falling in Love With You" starts rolling to reveal Big Burly Biker up on that nightclub stage in full-on Elvis get-up! I could die! His voice is pure velvet! Then a montage of tramp stamp doctor Tara gazing googly-eyed at Abel, Wendy foaming at the mouth and convulsing from all the crank while a zillion doctors hurriedly try to save her, and more of Big Burly Biker's performance, which is truly a sight to behold. He's fantastic. The montage ends with Jax tenderly looking over his son in one of those preemie incubators, trying to hold the tears back. Gemma slowly walks up behind him and whispers, "He's perfect." and Clay shows up behind the glass to complete the family portrait. It's really a very touching moment. A totally fucked up family, but a truly touching moment, just the same. Even criminals have feelings.