Sorority Life

Episode Report Card
Stee: B- | 379 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
The First Cut Is The Deepest

Karissa moves in. She gets the single, MamaStacey says, because she's very big into her schoolwork. And they don't want her constant phone-masturbating to be an issue. Maggie and Brooke are in a double. There is only one dresser, they note. "We're screwed," they say. Maggie fans her gigantic boobies, telling us that of all the girls, she knew Brooke the least. Man, they're going to hate each other. She can't survive without Julia. What's she gonna do? Julia, Mackenzie, and Nicole are in a triple. Nicole tells us she's nervous because she doesn't know the girls that well. Shot way from the side, which is definitely her best angle, Nicole tells the girls that all her clothes are hung. Mackenzie needs a dresser, but a bigger one than they have. Julia camera-whores (I'm kidding -- she actually seems sorta cool here, except for the whole porn vibe) that Nicole is going to be a "challenge," because she and Mackenzie say what's on their minds.

For real, this house is pretty dope. My friend lived in a frat in Berkeley, and there was, literally, poo on the floor. In the living room. And no one cleaned it up. It was the most disgusting place I've ever been. Gorgeous on the outside, poo-floors on the inside.

Maggie tries to order all the girls out of the bathroom so she can pee. Karissa says that Maggie is take-charge and it could provide some tensions. Maggie tells Brooke which dresser drawers they'll each be using. Brooke just stares at the ceiling, telling us that she left her house with her friends (her fish, her lover) to move in with strangers and what has she gotten herself into?

In the triple, Nicole tells us that Julia likes to sleep with the lights on. "And you have three other girls…" she bitches. Which proves she really may be the worst person at math on the planet. Julia lies in bed, all her whore make-up on for the night.

Day. Buffalo. Buffalo. Night again. Pledge house elections. The pledges sit around trying to decide who is going to be President and VP. Julia starts telling the girls what the duties of the president and VP are (calling the meeting to order, et cetera). For some reason, the other girls disagree with her. She then camera-talks that as VP of the American Marketing Association, she pretty much knows what the duties are. Ooh! I'm impressed! She has her mouth open in a Grimace Of Determination And Disbelief. Nicole finally asks who wants to be President. Only High Brittany raises her hand. Someone brats that they should do this in a "fair way." Nicole interrupts, saying that it doesn't matter because no one else wants to be president. She wins. Yeah, Brittany!

Sorority Life

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