Sorority Life
Ready, Set, Pledge

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The First Cut Is The Deepest

In the triple, Nicole tells us that Julia likes to sleep with the lights on. "And you have three other girls…" she bitches. Which proves she really may be the worst person at math on the planet. Julia lies in bed, all her whore make-up on for the night.

Day. Buffalo. Buffalo. Night again. Pledge house elections. The pledges sit around trying to decide who is going to be President and VP. Julia starts telling the girls what the duties of the president and VP are (calling the meeting to order, et cetera). For some reason, the other girls disagree with her. She then camera-talks that as VP of the American Marketing Association, she pretty much knows what the duties are. Ooh! I'm impressed! She has her mouth open in a Grimace Of Determination And Disbelief. Nicole finally asks who wants to be President. Only High Brittany raises her hand. Someone brats that they should do this in a "fair way." Nicole interrupts, saying that it doesn't matter because no one else wants to be president. She wins. Yeah, Brittany!

Now VP. Karissa and Julia both want it. Karissa stands up and says she wants to be VP because she's pretty level-headed and can see things from a distance, or some shit like that. Obviously, Karissa just can't not control everything, so even though she doesn't even want to be in the sorority, she needs to be VP. Julia says she has experience being VP of the AMA and she can delegate duties. Everyone interrupts her that they already have that…and then Brooke camera-prisses that the main source of tension is Julia just talking and no one else being able to get a word in. Finally Brooke tells Julia she can't run everything, and Julia tries to answer, and they then all write down their votes and everyone is talking and Brittany's first presidential duty is to shake up the ballots. Karissa. Brooke does this weird thing where she puts her head next to Karissa's, and in that moment, that gesture, you can tell something about Brooke that I knew the first moment she was buying a fish with her "roommate."

Anyway.

Julia camera-porns that she feels ganged up on, but it's okay because she knows she would have done a better job. Maggie then says it's forming into two cliques, her and Julia and Brooke and Karissa (Brooke and Karissa hold hands, y'all), and it's ready to explode! And cue the Blair Witch music, and credits! Wow. The hot lesbian tension is everywhere! (C'mon. I'm just trying to make it interesting for myself. Give me a break.)

Next time…Brooke in a hot tub. She tells us that all the pledges are trying to impress the sisters and it's ridiculous. MamaStacey yells at everyone and makes them put up some rules all over the house. It includes: "No drinking or drugs in the house." This is the worst sorority ever. Stacey is almost as hard to understand as Ozzy when she gets excited. It sounds like she tells them to put the "house-sters" up everywhere and not to "distrex" them. Then there's some weird thing where we see their fridge and they say they were "ransacked." Karissa is on the phone, asking someone to tell them who robbed them. Jigga-what? And that's it. See ya

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Sorority Life

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