Buffalo. Buffalo. House. Brooke has again lured Sister Laura up to her room, but her sex plan has once again been foiled by Karissa and the cameras. Karissa bitches that she's not ready for this quiz they have to take. Laura camera-Lavernes that she's worried about Karissa not making it through the pledge process. She says that Karissa has a lot of schoolwork or something. Karissa then asks Laura if she can come to the sister house and take the quiz later, but Laura assures her that if/when she fails, she can take it again and again until she passes. Like the driving test. Or the bar. Or the TV Guide crossword puzzle. (Those are hard, y'all! "Gone With ___ Wind." Hard shit.) While Karissa bitches, the cameraman just swings over and shoots down Brooke's cleavage. Fine work. And then I realize Laura is talking again, telling us that pledging is hard, but once you become a sister, the time commitment doubles, and Karissa needs to realize that. Yeah!
Later. Pledge meeting. A Domino's guy delivers ninety-four pizzas and three pounds of buffalo wings to the house. Nicole arrives late, wearing these terrible Sheryl Crow sunglasses. They don't even work on Sheryl Crow, let alone Nicole-face. When Nicole sees that Brooke is back, she squeals, and she and Brooke almost start making out. Meanwhile, Maggie shoots hatred across the room, the whole time gnawing on some cheesy bread, trying to keep the bile down. She starts talking about how upset she is that Brooke is back, and she's kissing so much ass trying to get into the sorority and Brooke isn't doing the same, and it makes her feel like Brooke doesn't deserve to be there. God, Maggie is seven. In the worst ways. Isn't it hard to live your life so jealous and full of anger and resentment? Doesn't it take less energy just to sort of let things slide and concentrate on your own life? I'll let Maggie ponder that while the cheesy bread makes its way back up her esophagus. (By the way, I wonder where all this money comes from to have these dope houses and to always have so much pizza and sodas all over the place? It's just a local sorority, right? Don't email! Let me just live in wonder.)
The girls have to take a weekly quiz on the history of the DZO. MamaStacey reads the questions off. "Name the thirteen founding sisters." A cameraman now gets right in Mackenzie's boobs. Good work again. As the next question comes, MamaStacey, camera-talking and looking rather nice this time, says that it's her job to educate the pledges, or some such bullshit. Next question. Spike's turn. "List your pledge sisters." Spike looks high. Maybe Brittany sold her some doob. Maggie tells us that she was annoyed with Brooke and Karissa, so she left them off the list of her pledge sisters. Oooooh. Shit. I don't know much about reality television, but I have a sense that's going to come into play somehow later!