When we come back, it's the exact same thing as the first Bobbi Bernstein episode. You know, where Dan's all jittery and she's the epitome of professionalism. Finally he asks her how she's doing, and she says she's fine. They go live, and Dan introduces Bobbi to the audience. They do that fake interviewing thing that commentators do with each other, where they ask each other planned questions, like, "Is Virginia's first-half press a surprise to anyone?" and Bobbi acts like she's so glad Dan asked her that, and she blah blahs about it and oh look! they have some videotape to look at to illustrate her point. Meanwhile, in the control room, Elliot comes in and Dana asks, "What did they say?" Elliot says Isaac's plane landed four hours ago and there's no answer at his house. Jeremy tries to reassure her by saying that on a Saturday night, coming up from JFK on the Triborough, four hours wouldn't be a record. Dana tries to accept this. Jeremy tells Elliot to check with the airport and make sure Isaac got on the plane. Dana tries to smile at Natalie, but Natalie doesn't smile back.
Back at the desk, Bobbi is wrapping up her spontaneous talk on Virginia's first-half press by saying, "That's what Virginia's been doing all season and that's what Georgia Tech's going to see all night long," and she gives the "all night long" a lascivious little tweak that, surprisingly, I found irritating. I mean, I hope that sex-kitten sportscaster thing works out for you, there, Bobbi, but I think you're trying too hard. Melissa Stark manages to be sexy on Monday Night Football without sounding like she's coming on to Dennis Miller -- although I guess if she did come on to him, that would be just kind of creepy. But she seems to know her stuff and does a good job, and that's what's important -- that and the sleeveless sweaters she wears when it's early in the football season and still warm enough to do so. Anyway, Dan asks Bobbi how Rebecca's ankle is. Dana glances at Natalie. "I'm sorry?" says Bobbi. Dan recovers and asks how Rick O'Brien's ankle is. They talk a little more about basketball, then throw back to more field coverage.
Dan apologizes to Bobbi for the slip-up, and she tells him not to worry about it as she heads behind the set to check her make-up. Dan follows her and says he couldn't help but notice that she's a lot calmer than normal. Didn't we do this last time as well? Someone familiarize Dan with the concept of letting sleeping dogs lie, please. Bobbi says she knows Dan's worried she's going to go "turbo" on him, but it's really okay. So once again we have to put up with Bobbi trying to leave it alone and Dana making an issue of it. She says they should "forget it" and walks away, sitting down to fumble through her purse. Dan doesn't want to let it drop. He says he's done enough rotten things to women that he's going straight to hell, but he doesn't need Bobbi "padding the ballot box." I don't know if I buy Dan as this cad who's going straight to hell. Even I have only the one time when I didn't call a girl (stay tuned!) so I'm not too worried about going to hell. Anyway, Dan says to her that the reason he never called her after sleeping with her in Spain is that he never slept with her in Spain. And the reason he never slept with her in Spain is that he's never been to Spain. "And the next time you bring this up, you better be armed with a picture of me with you in a hotel in Spain." Bobbi pulls a picture out of her purse and hands it to him. He examines it. "That's me," he says. Bobbi says yes, and asks if he can read what it says on the towel. "Hotel d'Espagne," he says. "The Hotel d'Espagne's in Spain?" D'oh! Bobbi tries to take the photo back, but Dan seems to be remembering something. "That's me in this picture," he says, "but that's not you." Bobbi says it is. Dan argues with her, he says that the girl in the picture is named Roberta. It dawns on him -- there's that Dartmouth education coming through. "Oh, holy cow," he says. "Bobbi Bernstein, pleased to meet you," she says. He says, "Bobbi, this looks nothing like you." She agrees and says, "Yeah, I turned into quite the babe, didn't I?" She takes the picture back and walks away. Well, that explains why Dan doesn't remember sleeping with her. Apparently she was fat, or ugly, or both, or something. And it explains how Dan could have been in Spain when he says he's never been to Spain. Oh wait, it DIDN'T EXPLAIN THAT AT ALL. But according to zapatos's fine Sports Night page, in the original script, Dan argues that the Hotel d'Espagne's in France, and he remembers being there, but Bobbi tells him that he and his friends drove from Spain from France, and the explanation offered is that he was really drunk (this happening during college, apparently). I have done lots of dumb things while drunk, some of which I've written about in these recaps. I beat up a good friend. I urinated in public. I agreed to work for Sars. I wore an army helmet and wandered around Halifax walking into stop signs. I said something to a woman that earned a slap, but I don't remember what I said and I don't even remember being slapped; I only found out about that the next day from a friend who saw it. But I can't conceive of being so drunk that I managed to go to Spain with friends and not remember any of it.