Dan is in Abby's waiting room, reading magazines. A woman walks out of her office and gets her coat, and Dan says "hi" and of course the woman is all jumpy and says, "Don't talk to me," and this scene was much funnier in Tin Cup, I have to say. Abby walks out and says, "Hey, come on in." Dan walks into her office and closes the door. "Is she okay?" says Dan. "Who?" says the short-attention-span shrink. Dan says the woman seemed a little crazy (and goes on about it a little too long) and Abby assures him that she's fine. "Listen, you want to hear something funny?" says Dan, and he explains that there was some debate over whether he was meeting her for a date or a session. "That is funny," says Abby, without putting Dan's fears to rest, which is clearly what he wants. "Have you ever been in therapy?" asks Abby. Dan says no, he's never felt the need. Abby currently is in therapy. "That's allowed?" says Dan, which I thought was funny. "It's encouraged," says Abby. Dan seems surprised. "I just assumed that someone who needed a therapist would want someone with a full supply of marbles." Uh, if this is a date, I think Dan just ruled out any possibility of a second date. Abby takes a step towards Dan and does that close-talking thing and tells him she has roughly the same number of marbles as everybody else. Dan for some reason says he has an excess of marbles. Abby says she can tell. "You're a nice guy and you're a smart guy," she says, and Dan acknowledges that. "So why doesn't your father like you?" she says. "What?" says Dan. "I believe in cutting through the first six months and getting to the stuff," she says. Dan is all, "Hold up," and says, "Are we on a date right now or having a session?" as if we haven't just had the answer to that. Abby asks him what he wants it to be. Dan says, "A date." Abby says "okay" and gets her handbag.
Dan wants to know why she asked him about his father. Abby asks him if he went to school to get good at what he does, and when he says yes, she says, "Me too." Dan says, "Why do you think my father doesn't like me?" and Abby says, "Why do you think your father doesn't like you?" like if I ever go to a therapist she'd better have some damn answers for me instead of always asking me questions like Abby does. Dan wants to know what Abby observed. She tells him not to worry about it, as if that's possible. "My father likes me, Abby," says Dan, "she likes me just fine." "'She'?" says Abby. Dan realizes he said "she," realizes this is a session, not a date, and that he wore his best boxers for nothing, and gets a little freaked. Abby suggests they sit down, and she flops onto a couch and leans back, indicating she went to the ever-popular sex kitten school of psychology. Dan sits down.