This episode starts with a shot of a computer screen with the Sports Night Web site on it, and the camera pans around and reveals Dan staring at the computer as Casey comes into their office. They say "hey" and "good morning" to each other, and Dan asks Casey if he knows what this week's "internet poll" is and Casey says, "Who's cooler, Dan or Casey?" and Dan tells him he's right, which is sad because the poll doesn't have a "neither" option. Dan pretends to decry the poll since they're "journalists," but still asks Casey if he knows how many people voted; Casey doesn't, and Dan informs him that 159 people have voted, so maybe the entire Sports Night audience voted twice each. "Really," says Casey. "You know who's winning?" says Dan. "I'm assuming you are," says Casey, and Dan says he's not. "I am?" says Casey, and I think that yeah, that's the only other possible option. "How 'bout that," says Casey, all false nonchalance, and he starts saying something about Notre Dame until Dan interrupts him to tell him he's winning 153-6, and Casey seems surprised and says, "Quite a landslide so far," and then he starts blah-blahing about some "grassroots groundswell" but Danny isn't having it and says, "How are you rigging it?" Casey makes this "come on!" face and says, "Danny." Dan asks him if he stayed up all night voting for himself. "Yeah, like I don't have anything better to do than beat your ass in an internet poll," says Casey. Dan says, "Here's the thing about you: it's not that you want to win so bad, it's that you won't admit you want to win." Casey insincerely offers to withdraw from the competition, but Dan won't give up because he has "plenty of fans." "At least half a dozen," says Casey. Then the two of them decide to leave off this macho posturing, which is completely ridiculous anyway since we're talking about an internet poll, for crying out loud.
Casey strolls out of the office, passing Jeremy, who says hello, and Casey does that "walk with me" command thing that is really annoying, done by people who want to exert authority over someone without giving them the courtesy of actually stopping to talk, preferring instead to pretend to be so busy that they can't actually stop walking and so they give instructions while the other person trails pathetically behind like a six-year-old kid brother. In Casey's case, though, he's all annoyingly secretive and tells Jeremy to walk "casually" so it doesn't look like they're up to something and I think Casey should turn off the monthly TBS James Bond-athon once in a while, because I'm not sure exactly why a producer talking to the on-air talent would arouse suspicions, but whatever. Casey leads Jeremy out into a deserted hallway/stairwell-looking set that I don't know if we've seen before. We learn that Casey in fact did stay up all night voting for himself, and Jeremy manages not to bust up laughing at that. Casey wants Jeremy to help devise a way to vote faster and more efficiently. "I want to bury him," says Casey. Jeremy says it's unethical, since the results are announced over the air, which is pretty sad, since internet polls are hardly representative surveys of anything because of the potential for precisely the kind of abuse being discussed here, although to his credit Jeremy does call them "idiot polls." Although maybe that just means that every single one of them is about Dan and Casey. Weenie Jeremy is worried about getting in trouble, and Casey convinces him by reminding Jeremy of all the pranks Dan played on Jeremy when he was new, like gluing all Jeremy's things to his desk and sending Jeremy for the "ignition keys" to the cameras, and I have to say those are pretty funny, and reminded me of when I worked in a restaurant in Calgary, and the standard joke to play on the new waiter or waitress would be to say the cappuccino machine was broken and give them a cup and a saucer and send them over to a neighbouring restaurant for a "cup of steam" and tell them they'd have to trap the steam in the upside-down cup over the saucer, and you would not BELIEVE how often the new person fell for that.