Sports Night
Ordnance Tactics

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Bombast

A little later, in Isaac's office. Dana is on the phone with someone named Alan, saying "it's no problem" and "it's here somewhere." She's flipping through piles of papers on Isaac's desk as Natalie comes in and watches the chaos. Dana tells Alan she'll call him back when she finds it and hangs up, just as Natalie has found the paper Dana's looking for and is handing it to her. Natalie tells her that Sally has put together a Q&A on the feed from Tucson, and turns to leave. Dana stops her. "It's what J.J. wanted," she says apologetically. "He made a threat and I believed him." Natalie is very understanding as Dana explains that now is not a good time to be fighting with the network. "No problem," says Natalie, turning to go.

But we hear Dan and Casey long before they actually enter the room, yelling "No problem!" and "Don't worry about it!" and "Everything's fine!" and such. Dana wants to know what's going on, and the boys sum it up for her -- yesterday the building had to be evacuated because some people didn't like Denny Denton's lisping impression of Jesus. Man, I'd be offended by that too. Not because of the Jesus thing, but isn't the whole lisping-equals-gay thing pretty played? I mean, who does that anymore? Who thinks it's funny anymore? Who wants to return to a time when John Ritter could make money doing that? Anyway, Dan says his girlfriend, whom he's grown fond of, is thinking of going back to her husband, "but that's just because he treats her bad." Casey says the only good thing in Jeremy's life right now is Natalie, so he thinks this would a good time to get rid of her. Dan's turn -- he says the networks have decided to show Dana who's boss, and if she doesn't do something "lickety-split," it's going to be J.J. Dana gives him a little glare on that one. "And, oh yeah," says Casey, and he reminds them that Isaac's lying in a bed in Columbia Presbyterian after having a stroke. Dan asks if there's anything else. Casey reminds him that they have the live feed from Tucson. "Then we're all set!" says Dan, and they clench their fists and say "good show!" to Dana and Natalie and head out the door. The look on Dana's face indicates that she's having none of this. "We're women," Natalie calls after them. The boys come back into Isaac's office, confused.

"We're women," Dana repeats. Casey makes a snarky comment about how there's considerable evidence to support that theory. Dana goes on about women keeping it together when the going gets tough. "That's what we do," she explains. Casey's a little incredulous at this. "Well, we're men. We're petrified. That's what we do," he says, making Natalie smile. Dan says they've found that giving in to their fears has made them stronger. Casey points out that it's also made them pathetic. "But mostly stronger," offers Dan. Then they remind Dana and Natalie that if they're sad or mad or scared, they should say so, because Dan and Casey might be able to say something to make them feel better. "That's the other thing we do," says Casey. Dana and Natalie consider this. "Did you say a lisp?" says Dana. "Yes," says Casey. "Denny Denton was doing Jesus with a lisp?" she says. Casey says yes again. "And that's why someone tried to blow us up." "Yes." "I still hate you, you know." "Yes." "Isaac had a stroke and somebody tried to blow up the building. We're not having our best week, are we?" Casey says "no," then tells her, checking his watch, that they're going to get some good news in about eleven seconds. "Good news? What?" says Dana. "You ready?" says Casey. Then, over the intercom, Elliot: "Three minutes to air, first team to the studio." Dana and Natalie both laugh. Casey says, "Have a good show," and he and Dan smile as they leave the office. Oh, all right. Aw.

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