Sports Night
Small Town

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Daniel: B- | Grade It Now!
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Unconfirmed retorts

Anyway. Dan called Casey to kvetch about Bobbi, who is sitting at the desk. Casey says she's got "the crazy eyes," and Casey says Dan should have called her. Dan gets his shorts in a bunch and says he never slept with her. Casey says, "You should have slept with her and then called her." Dan ignores this and asks how Leeza is. Casey tries to explain the Lisa/Leeza thing, but only confuses Dan. Then Casey glances over at the table and says, "You know who looks good tonight? Dana." Dan smirks and says, "How's Gordon look?" in exactly the way a good friend should deliver a reminder like that. Casey dourly tells Dan to have a good show, and Dan says "thanks."

Back at the table, Dana is still waiting on the phone and explaining to Gordon and Leeza that she's not questioning Natalie's capability; it's just that Natalie's very young and from a very small town in Ohio. Even Leeza seems to be losing her interest in keeping up appearances and her First Date Perma-Smile is fading for her lips, her...quite magnificent lips...get your ass on out of here, Ashley Judd. I'm looking for a little Leeza lovin' now. Anyway, Dana says Natalie's from a town so small that it's hard to believe she's kept Dana waiting this long.

Cut to a shot of a very relaxed Natalie sauntering through the Sports Night sets. She actually has kind of a dreamy quality to her face, like she's been given anesthetic. She makes her way to the control room, where she starts giving orders. Kim reminds her that Dana's still on hold. Natalie sits down, puts on the headset, and says, "This is a very comfortable chair." Dana whines that Natalie took her sweet time, and then Natalie asks her to put Casey on. Dana protests, but Natalie says it's just for a second, then right back to Dana. Dana hands the phone to Casey. "Keep her off the phone," says Natalie. "You bet," says Casey, who snaps the phone shut and hands it back to Gordon. Gordon says "thanks," all too happy to have his woman put back in her place. Dana vanquished, the gang sets about looking at the menu. Casey says he has questions about the fennel salad. Like what, Gordon says. Like what fennel is, says Casey. Okay, we get it. Casey's a man. Drinks beer straight from the bottle, doesn't know what fennel is. I better double-check this. Sars, I know that knowing what fennel is doesn't make a guy gay, but does knowing what fennel is make a woman suspect that he's gay? ["No." -- Sars] Uh huh. And how about using fabric softener? ["What? God, no." -- Sars] Okay, and how much of a fight should a guy put up when a woman suggests that the two of you see Bridget Jones's Diary? ["I'd go with 'eye-roll and put-upon sigh.' It's not that chicky of a flick, actually." -- Sars] Anyway, Dana excuses herself from the table. Leeza asks where she's going. Gordon says, resignedly, that she's going to ask the bartender to change the channel to CSC. Casey tells Leeza that, unlike Dana, he is able to enjoy a relaxing evening out. Lisa gives him a half-smile with a slight curl that says she's not enjoying herself that much. Casey asks her what time it is. She says, "It's about..." and Casey spazzes off on how he wants the exact time, which doesn't answer the question why, if it's so damn important to him, he doesn't wear a watch himself. Gordon, in the exact tone of voice he had when he was talking about Dana, says, "It's eleven o'clock," so Casey does a Seated Fist-Pump and yells, "D it up, Danny!" or "Tee it up, Danny!" or maybe "I am a moron, Danny!" and then grins goofily at Leeza and says, "How ya' doin'?"

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Sports Night

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