Sports Night
The Sword Of Orion

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B+ | 1 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
This is the worst trip / I've ever been on

Conference room. Dan and Casey sit, by themselves. They look around, fairly certain there's supposed to be a rundown meeting going on, wondering why no one else is there. Casey seizes the opportunity to start bragging about how well-rounded he is. His evidence: he speaks many languages, he knows how to juggle, and he plays the piano. And just so you know how desperate I was for something to happen, I passed the time by comparing myself to Casey. I can juggle and I play the piano, but I only speak two languages. You'd be surprised how much it depresses you to measure yourself against Casey and come up short. Dan is likewise desperate to escape Casey running down his good qualities, and demands that people enter the room. As if on cue -- well, it is a television show -- everybody else starts coming in from both ends of the room. You'd think a larger audience would only encourage Casey to continue, but here it shuts him up. Dana gives Will crap for sitting in Isaac's chair. Will feebly says, "I thought Isaac wasn't here," but Dana says he still can't sit in Isaac's chair. Does that rule apply to everybody, or is it just because this is Will, the office doormat? Dana starts going on about how excited she is because this meeting only has nine items to cover and they're going to quickly get through them. Then she says "bam!" a whole bunch of times and really, any time that might have been saved she has totally wasted by babbling endlessly about just how quick this meeting's going to go. Dan interrupts her to say, "Dana," and he puts his hand up, and Dana groans and covers her face with her hands and says, "This meeting sucks!" and maybe somebody should be concerned about Dana's bi-polar disorder here.

Anyway, Dan interrupts just to tell everybody that he's taping the Orioles game because Orlando Rojas is pitching, and he's warning everybody not to mention the outcome of the game in his presence. He wants to share a sports experience with Rebecca. Aw, isn't that sweet. If only there were the occasional sporting event in New York, Dan wouldn't have to tape something. Casey reasonably points out that it might be difficult for Dan not to find out since, essentially, it's his job to find out. Not to worry, because apparently Dan has spent the entire day figuring out the logistics of it. He instructs Casey to take the Orioles game, tells Elliot to reroute the sports wire so that Dan doesn't get American League scores in his office, and asks Kim to coach the staff in signals to warn each other when Dan is coming so they'll know to shut up about the game, and he wants a blindfold and a Walkman and tells Dana that, just to be on the safe side, she should put a Hefty bag over the floor monitors. Okay, now I forgive Dana's extreme reaction earlier. Dana asks Natalie to kill her now, which is likewise completely understandable. After Dan's done, Dana thinks they're going to get back on track, but Jeremy has something. He says tomorrow is the tenth anniversary of the wreck of The Sword of Orion in the Governor's Cup, a sailboat race from New York to Nassau. Casey says something about not noticing Jeremy. He's over there, Casey, behind your battleship-sized ego. Jeremy lays it out for them: The Sword of Orion was favoured to win, but went "massively" and "inexplicably" off-course into 90 mph winds and 30-foot seas. He says the tactician, the son of the boat's owner, was thrown overboard and drowned, and some other dudes went overboard but they were later rescued. For his feature, Jeremy wants to recreate what happened. I won't list all the work and sources Jeremy has amazingly already lined up, but it's impressive. Then he starts babbling about getting the nautical charts and learning how to read them, which he's confident he can do. The more he speaks, the more obvious it is to everyone (demonstrated by shots of the rest of the crew listening, slightly puzzled) that this feature really means a lot to Jeremy. The reasons will be made anvil-clear later on. He asks Dana for permission to do the feature, but she seems unsure. "It's a good idea, Dana," says Casey quietly. Dana recovers; she seems a little stunned, but was probably just confused by the sudden poignant lite electric guitar that has kicked in to underscore the gravity of Jeremy's request. Dana gives him the okay and tells him to keep Natalie posted. Commercials.

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