Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip
The Friday Night Slaughter

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Joe R: C+ | Grade It Now!
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I Am Battle

...back to 2007, where Danny and Cal want to cut -- coincidence! -- a Julia Roberts sketch. "I got Julia Roberts right," says Matt. Cal suggests that he got it right a long time ago, so maybe they should move on to something fresh. Danny observes that all of Harriet's sketches tonight are characters she debuted seven years ago. So...are we clear on the dynamics here? Danny and Cal want to move on with the new and cut some of Harriet's six thousand sketches from the show, while Matt would prefer to revel in the comfort of days gone by and win his girl back the way he did the first time: by writing for her. Matt's also distracted by the flashbacks, though, and asks if either Cal or Danny remembers Tim Batale. They're both kind of confused. Cal's all, "I ate lamb?" Danny's like, "Lime at bat?" No, no. Tim Batale! You remember, Tim Batale? Writer, used to work here, Wes fired him. Danny and Cal don't remember some more, and even look at each other, halfway to making the motion where your finger circles your ear, all, "Cuckoo!" Matt gets mad that they don't remember, and Danny snaps at him to focus, because they have a show to put on. Back to the grown-ups in the room -- and you have no idea how much it pains me to identify Danny as the adult in the room: Danny notes that Tom and Dylan are standing outside the office, trying to pretend that they're not staking out the big board to see if their sketch, "Metric Conversion," makes it on to the show. Cal decides to fuck with them, an impulse I can completely respect, and starts pointing to the "Metric Conversion" index card all, "Yeah! Yeah, it's a good one." But then he takes the card away, saying, "But it could not be in the show." They keep pulling the card and putting it back, and through the window, Dylan guesses that they're being fucked with. Tom yells through the window, "You think this is funny?" Dylan tells him to chill: "They'll know we're watching." Tom explains that they already know they're watching, hence the fucking with them. Tom and Dylan begin to psych themselves into a positive frame of mind, settling on Tom's assertion that theirs is "the little sketch that could." Trust me, after a year on the American Idol beat, I can attest that people LOVE to support perceived underdogs. Tom mentions that they've been trying to get this on the air for "six weeks," but they keep working on it, and it'll make it one day. It will! ("It will!") It's good! ("It's good!") Dylan waits a beat; then: "Not that many people laughed." "Not as many as you'd hope," agrees Tom. Oh, you bumbling goofballs. So they go back to fretting, and round the corner to the window behind Matt's desk. "Yeah, I see you in there, you Irish..." Tom asks Dylan for a good Irish insult. Dylan offers "glorified electrician," and Tom almost repeats it until he realizes that it sucks. "Now we're the bitches," he says, in that glorious Nate Corddry way.

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Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip

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