Skater Punk continues to be mobbed by hotties, while Matt and Harriet continue their argument at the table. "What was going to happen then?" asks Harriet. After Matt beat Luke in the auction and showed up on their date, she means. Matt is really mystified that Harriet isn't throwing flower petals at his feet for this: "What damn Harriet crime have I committed now?" It's a good thing Harriet's already winding up for a swift kick to Matt's giblets, because otherwise I'd feel obligated. "What damn Harriet crime"? You're lucky you're getting out alive, punk. Harriet clarifies that Matt was only bidding to beat out Luke. "What happened to your sense of flattery?" Matt asks. THWACK! Sorry, Harry, I couldn't wait. "What was going to happen then, after you flattered me?" asks Harriet. "I was going to go home, right? Alone? I was going to go home and think about how much I want you." Matt starts off with a "Gee, Harriet," like he just wanted to take her to a nice dinner, but she cuts that bullshit off before he can begin: "Don't play stupid with me, Matt. It's incredibly rude." He tells her to settle down, but much like Aimee Mann, she can't just hush-hush, even if their voices carry. Harriet confirms that that was what was supposed to happen: she was supposed to go home alone and think of what an awesome guy Matt is. "And then what?" she asks again. After that. After he won. After he defeated Luke once and for all, what was he going to do with his Harriet-shaped cash and prizes? Matt doesn't have an answer for this. "We're going to be finished tonight," Harriet says, evenly and determinedly. "Don't be scared." Excellent work by Sarah Paulson here. I've found Harriet shrill and maddening in the past, but I was 100% behind her here. And with the way they're acting out on Matt's speechless face, I think this breakup might actually stick.
And...seriously? We couldn't just end the episode on that well-acted note? We have to go back to the snake wranglers? Ugh. Whatever, they're going to have to send in a coyote to get the ferret that went in to get the snake. Nobody says what they're going to send in after the spider that wiggled and jiggled and tickled inside her, but maybe that gets answered in Part II. Anyway: Snakes In A Studio! Tune in next week to see if anyone gets poisoned to death! Though I seriously doubt it!