Matt finally notices the giant wooden bat in Harriet's hand, and asks whether it's for him. Harriet offers it as a non-romantic gift for doing two great shows in a row. It's signed by Darren Wells, who I guess is a baseball player, and she got it when she sang the national anthem at the Dodgers game. Matt gets all suspicious: "Wait, he gave this to you?" Harriet says yes, and now she's giving it to him. Matt thinks that there might be something missing from this story, and finds it when he notices that Darren has written his phone number on the end of the bat. Matt is no longer pleased with this completely romantic non-romantic gift. Harriet tries to blow it off, all, "Oh, I just thought that was his uniform number!" Matt: "You thought his uniform number was three billion, one hundred and six million, seven hundred eighty-six thousand, five hundred? He was ASKING YOU OUT." Harriet thinks, now that she's had some time to reflect upon it, that Matt might be right. Matt can't believe she just gave him the equivalent of a used cocktail napkin. They then proceed to get into a big fight about it. Harriet says that she wasn't trying to make him jealous. Matt wants to know if Darren Wells asked her out. Harriet does that thing where she pretends she didn't hear him to buy herself some time to come up with a better answer than the truth, but she loves Jesus and Jesus hates lies, so she confesses that Darren has asked her out, and that they've had dinner. And as a bonus, he's coming to the show on Friday! She says as she's stomping out of the room that she didn't give Matt the bat to be mean -- it was an honest mistake. Matt doesn't believe her, and accuses her of being manipulative. Oh, just make out already. Harriet calls Matt "Skipper," and says that if she wanted to make Matt jealous, he'd certainly be jealous. Matt: "I AM jealous!" Harriet's like, "Well, bonus for me!" Matt can't respond, because Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky, and Mike -- wait, sorry, wrong decade. Cool it, now. Ricky and Ron have arrived to tell Matt that they've got ninety seconds of good material for him. Harriet suddenly (and inexplicably? The timing is really weird) calls up the stairs, "Are we done?" Matt yells back that he's certain they're not, and then turns around and reads what Ricky/Ron have handed him. "This is funny," he declares I'm certain it's not, but okay. Credits.