Downstairs, Harriet comes upon a disheveled and jumpy Jordan in Harriet's dressing room, gathering her things. Harriet reminds Jordan that she needs to get her baseball signed, and Jordan says that she did: "He was very nice, thank you." Harriet wants to know what he wrote, and Jordan starts to beg off. Harriet catches on to shifty Jordan's shifty display of shiftiness pretty quickly and asks, "He wrote his phone number, didn't he?" Jordan's silence is all the answer she needs. "I deserved that," Harriet tells Jordan, who asks why. Guess Martha hasn't had the chance to spill Matt's role in the baseball-bat story yet. Harriet's take on it, however, is that Darren is "the anti-Matt," and apparently the lack of smugness is balanced by the womanizing-pig routine. I told you! Jordan says that she threw the ball in the dumpster, and then fell in said dumpster herself. And I can't tell if it's because of the pratfalling or the display of loyalty, but Harriet says, "For somebody with no friends, you're a natural. How did two people beat you out for Life Of The Party?" Jordan's all, "I know!," and says it's unfathomable, though she's still got enough gin in her to make that last word an obstacle course. Jordan and Harriet just kind of smile at each other, because they are friends. Yay! I like them.
The writers' room is empty (and somehow uncluttered, which I find unbelievable considering the wretched state it was in the last time we saw it) except for Eli and Lilly ["heh" -- Wing Chun] when Cal brings in Matt and Danny. He introduces them to Eli, "freshman writer for The Philco Comedy Hour." Matt introduces himself in the voice you'd use to address a particularly slow kindergartener. Danny does the same and asks if Eli's up for telling them everything he can remember about the old days. You see, the elderly may be a chore to put up with sometimes, but they have valuable stories to tell, often stories that are relevant to the events in your life. Like how, in the old days, the network wasn't comfortable with political humor. Just like it is today! And in the old days, Eli had a crush on the lady comic and the only reason he got a sketch on the air was because he was trying to impress her. Just like Matt and Harriet! We see Harriet over Matt's shoulder as Eli's saying this part, but she's suddenly crushed by an anvil that got shaken loose from the rafters. Eli doesn't notice, because he's too busy talking about how nobody's funnier than the Marx Brothers and Phil Silvers, though don't tell Milton Berle he said that. Ah, old people. It's funny when they don't know that people are dead.