Stylista
Stylista

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: A- | 1111 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Personal Shoppers

The clock tick-tocks as the underlings scuttle out. Dyshaun leisurely lights up as he screams for some others not to get in the cab without him. A cab? For six blocks? They arrive and dither around the deli looking for healthy food. God bless her, Kate even picks up a whole pineapple, and I realize that I would pay five dollars just to see one of these idiots hacking into a coconut with a machete.

Elsewhere, Ashlie runs around like a headless chicken in stilettos because, inexplicably, she's didn't get the directions. She freaks out that she's going to be cut. Frankly, if she couldn't find a deli in New York City, she deserves to get the Louboutin bootie. They're on every corner, for cryin' out loud! With 15 minutes left, plating has begun. Except for Ashlie, who is still searching. She arrives and has two minutes for plating. She seems to do an okay job of it, but I'm sure Anne Slowey will tell us what's what.

Speak of the Devil, the elevator dings and out glides Anna -- I mean Miranda -- Damn it! I mean Anne Slowey. She blazes through the office, issuing fiery glances. The minions stare as she passes, and someone drawls, "Hi, Annnnnne," but she doesn't stoop to acknowledge this lowly attention. She's Anne Slowey. Brett instructs the plebes to bring their trays into Anne's office. They file in. Danielle TH's that she's terrified. Rightly so. Forget the egg whites and fruit. Anne will eat her for breakfast! Anne gets up from checking her online dating profile and gives an icy stare to the contestants and their rattling trays. Commercials.

Back in purgatory, Anne introduces herself and says that in her world, "you either get it, or you don't." This is the kind of bullshit Kate would probably be jotting down if she didn't have a tray in hand. Anne decides to find out if these inferiors "get it" by evaluating their offerings.

Speaking of note-taking, you guys should get your pens out because this stuff is going to be important. Re: coffee, Anne only takes iced lattes with a small straw. (She's missing out, though, the swirly ones are so much more fun!) On Megan's tray, she approves of the Kombucha, but says it'd be better with an iced latte. So she likes tea with a side of coffee? Mmmmkay. Also, she appreciates candles and flowers, but does not eat wheat or almonds and detests when melon is mixed with other fruits. Simple, no?

Stylista

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