Stepping aside from all of this is chilled-out Arnaldo, 23, who introduces himself as a writer and poet with a Columbia degree. He explains that fashion is a means of self-expression. Cut back to Megan, who snips, "I hate that girl!" Arnaldo apportions the first helping of "Shut up, Megan!" by incredulously wondering how she can hate someone she just met. Because she's a self-righteous hag, that's how.
Kate continues bubbling over with positive energy, so Megan thrusts her junior high-style mockery onto an easier target. She TH's that Kate is more of a sexy secretary than a brain like Megan. She snarks about Kate's fake boobs. That comment scores her one bitchy soul mate in Dyshaun, a 24-year-old wardrobe stylist.
ELLE Photo Director Brett Ramey and Fashion Bookings Editor Malina Joseph break up the bratfest and explain the rules of the game. To snag a spot on the magazine's editorial team, they must endure eight weeks' of exposure to Anne Slowey. Ashlie, a 22-year-old fashion buyer explains that Anne Slowey is respected and that the fashion industry is all about who you know. Malina tells the peons that she and Brett started as assistants.
Next, she tells them that Anne will be there in 40 minutes and gives them their first assistant task. Supercilious Megan TH's she can handle anything they throw at her, but she wouldn't deign to serve coffee. Cut back to Brett saying that the interns will have to -- you guessed it! -- serve Anne coffee... and a healthy breakfast. Brett says this task shows their style through food choice and presentation.
The peons get $40 and the address of a deli six blocks away. And can I just say, holy crap? $40 is scads of money for breakfast. Most NYC delis will give you a full breakfast with coffee for $3.99. Of course, that's regular-people food that's not enriched with angel's wings and Botox Cosmetic.
The clock tick-tocks as the underlings scuttle out. Dyshaun leisurely lights up as he screams for some others not to get in the cab without him. A cab? For six blocks? They arrive and dither around the deli looking for healthy food. God bless her, Kate even picks up a whole pineapple, and I realize that I would pay five dollars just to see one of these idiots hacking into a coconut with a machete.
Elsewhere, Ashlie runs around like a headless chicken in stilettos because, inexplicably, she's didn't get the directions. She freaks out that she's going to be cut. Frankly, if she couldn't find a deli in New York City, she deserves to get the Louboutin bootie. They're on every corner, for cryin' out loud! With 15 minutes left, plating has begun. Except for Ashlie, who is still searching. She arrives and has two minutes for plating. She seems to do an okay job of it, but I'm sure Anne Slowey will tell us what's what.