Ultimately, Anne actually picks Ashlie's tray for its minimalist aesthetic. Ha! If that doesn't prove that tastemakers are full of crap, then I don't know what does. Anne concludes she's looking for three things: a passion for fashion, an ability to turn ideas into an exciting magazine, and great personal style. The edit now show a near-tears William every other shot until Anne goes for the TKO, saying some of the underlings look like they've just walked out of a costume shop. Or Williamsburg.
Anne sends the ragamuffins to see Joe Zee, ELLE's Creative Director and stylists to the stars. He will teach them the basics of ELLE style. Joe Zee's lessons are also threefold:
First impressions are important.
Understand the current trends.
Have a functional and versatile look.
Jewels. All of them. Really. Next stop, fashion week! Joe Zee condescends to advise each of them on their personal style. First off, he commends Jason's versatile all-black look but questions his indoor-inappropriate scarf and Michael Jackson-ish fingerless glove. Next, Joe Zee thinks Bible-salesman-esque Arnaldo should have more fun with his look. He essentially agrees with me when he says that Megan's dress, despite being this-season Chanel, isn't office-appropriate. He reprimands Kate for wearing an evening dress that inspires him to go motorboating. (And I'm not talking about the Hudson River, either.) He thinks Devin's outfit, specifically the hat, overshadows her work.
And send in the clown! William steps forward, and we get a full-body view. Oh, my friends, in addition to the aforementioned orange shirt, vest, bowler hat, and neckerchief, there are purple-green-and-black argyle socks and pedal pusher-length skinny jeans. It's like Tyra Banks staged a second fashion nightmares photo shoot. Joe Zee is rendered speechless, and everyone laughs. Joe Zee says the outfit is over-styled, costume-y, and looks like William is going to play the drums at midnight in a bar in Williamsburg. (Let the record show that I was there first.) In short, it's inappropriate and generally sucks at life (I added that second part). Then we get a pan up and, Oh. My. God. He's wearing jazz shoes. And the bowler cap has a twee little feather in it. This outfit is the train wreck that keeps on crashing. It's the outfit equivalent of Lindsay Lohan circa summer 2007!