Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A- | 1 USERS: B
Didn't You Get the Memo?

Back at the firm, Jessica isn't pleased even as Harvey maintains that the memo is bullshit. She believes him, but she doesn't want Hardman to know about this. Harvey says they need to tell Hardman before he finds out on his own, but Jessica tells him to make it go away first. Good luck with that.

Mike arrives at his cubicle to find Louis already there with a stack of folders. Louis gives him the bullet: their client Liquid Water -- whose clever slogan is "We put the IQ in Liquid" -- is being sued by a competitor, Durham Foods, for having an allegedly deceptive slogan. And not for having a dumb-ass brand name, which is what I initially thought. Louis says their defense will be that the slogan is "puffery," an obviously overblown statement that nobody is meant to believe (even though Louis clearly did, as shown by his reaction to Mike taking this idea and running with it). With that out of the way, Mike wonders why he needs to waste his time with the stack of motions Louis is assigning him. Louis reminds Mike that they're at war and Louis is his commanding officer -- exclusively, for the next two weeks. "You're in by seven, you're out no sooner than ten... and no sex of any kind. Weakens legs, clouds your judgment." That's the most important part, as Louis keeps repeating it as he leaves the bullpen. Like Mike's been getting any since Jenny dumped him anyway.

In Harvey's office, Donna is extravagantly offended at even the suggestion that she ever saw that damning CM memo before. Harvey says that if it was for real at the time, any one of two dozen people who worked on the case could have seen it. "I need to know that didn't happen or I need to know who to fire." "Give me an order," Donna snaps. Harvey tells her to go through all the original case files to make sure the memo wasn't there. As she leaves, Mike enters to beg mercy from Harvey, who says he not only has to honor his bet, but has to go talk to the CM's CEO -- a Mr. Kemp -- to try and straighten out his fraud case. And he isn't bringing Mike no matter how much he begs.

In the library, Harold bumbles around a corner to find Rachel posing seductively on a ladder. Or she might as well be, given the way Harold and the camera stare at her through a mutual film of drool. Apparently, Rachel doesn't have much to do this week other than look hot. Harold clumsily makes a conversational overture, accidentally impedes her reach for a volume and ends up promising to get her three staplers to replace her broken one. That didn't go well, but I bet he could still save the situation by finding her a red Swingline.

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