Johnny walks in and points out that Derrick made a friend. Cut to Derrick, playing outside with his new friend. The friend is telling Derrick how babies are made, and of course, his information is totally wrong, but in a hilarious "Kids Say the Darndest Things" kind of way. Derrick asks how people get to heaven. The kid comes up with some gruesome ways to die, but Derrick is looking for a quick and painless method. The friend offers to look into it. Derrick asks him to hurry, because he knows what he's getting his mom for her birthday: "Me!" I feel like they wanted me to clutch my pearls at the end of that scene and go, "But...but...he's just a little boy! How can he want to kill himself? He has so much to live for! Oh, I hope that Ava thwarts his plans!" Instead, I went, "Wow, that kid is kind of ugly. I wonder if I have anything containing chocolate in this house."

That night, some blonde girl grabs a secret key and sneaks into the beach house. She goes into a bedroom and makes a suggestive comment. But -- wait for it -- she's in Derrick's bed! She thought it was Jay! But it was Derrick! Isn't that hilarious? Derrick yells, and everyone runs into the bedroom. Nikki starts threatening the girl. Jay runs in and says the girl is his friend. The girl explains the misunderstanding, but no one seems to think it's wacky. Jay leads the woman off as she apologizes. Ava tells everyone to get back to bed as she says again, "And so the day begins." Which doesn't even make sense there, because it's the middle of the night. It should be, "And so the day sort of ends but also begins." I guess that's not quite as pithy.

Bradin takes a surfing lesson from Erica. She shows him how to paddle and then hop up onto his board, making sure to touch him as much as possible. Bradin asks why they aren't in the water yet. Um, because your parents just died in a tragic water-related accident? Erica says he looks like he can handle the ocean, and she calls him "farm boy," which is just annoying. Bradin watches her run into the water lustfully. She stops to admire another surfer, and he runs past her into the water to prove himself. She calls out, "Go, Kansas!" Wait. One nickname at a time, please. Is he "Kansas," or is he "Farm Boy"?