Supernatural

The Hardy Boys Raise a Little Hell

Lucifer Rising - Or, you know, a great big one. Your choice. Oh, Sam!

Crying Won't Help The Hardy Boys

When the Levee Breaks - And praying won't do them no good. Kicking the living crap out of each other, however, seems to help immensely. Good to know.

The Hardy Boys Just Have Their Party On TV

The Rapture - Pity that party's so dull. Castiel's bible-thumping Vessel gets his very own flashback episode, and while some found it touching, I don't think I've ever been so bored in my entire life. Next!

The Hardy Boys Nuke the Fridge

Jump The Shark - Well, I couldn't use "jump the shark," now could I? Our Intrepid Heroes receive a desperate call from their actual, honest-to-God half-brother, and it ends as well as we've come to expect on this show. I don't think I have the strength to make it through the last three episodes of the season.

The Hardy Boys Are NOT Having SEX With Each Other! GOD!

The Monster At The End Of This Book - Our Intrepid Heroes learn of LARPing and Wincest, all while A Prophet Of The Lord's predicting their bloody defeat at Lilith's hand. It's a wonder they made it through the episode without killing themselves.

The Hardy Boys Are Well-Respected Men

It's A Terrible Life - But only because yet another interfering angel's douched them up with corporate jobs and fake backstories for the evening. Dean Smith and Sam Wesson, model employees at Sandover Bridge & Iron in the great state of Ohio, find their routines disrupted when several colleagues off themselves in manners both deeply gruesome and deeply awesome. Together, they manage to solve the case, but will Smith & Wesson ever discover the source of their mysteriously shared anomie? Duuuuuuh.

The Hardy Boys Go Where Angels Fear to Tread

On The Head Of A Pin - Yeah, that title sucks, but it's the best I could do after this episode's hideously depressing final scene. Dean learns he inadvertently broke the first of Lilith's seals, thereby setting in motion the current crisis, and I'm sure he'd kill himself were it not for the fact he's all but immobilized in a hospital bed thanks to Alastair, who brutalized Our Intrepid Author Of The Apocalypse after a torture session gone horribly wrong. Sing it if you know it, kids: Oh, Dean!

The Hardy Boys Full-On Swayze That Mother. Again.

Death Takes a Holiday - A Wyominginian Reaper goes missing, so everyone has to suffer in this week's installment, including, but not limited to, Our Intrepid Astral Idiots, that little kid from Weeds, the little kid from Weeds's boozy sot of a mother, Tessa The Reaper from Season Two, Show Barnes, and -- most especially -- the audience, the latter because Fake Brando's back, and he's even more annoying than ever.

Sex and The Single Hardy Boys

Sex And Violence - This week, Our Intrepid Heroes take on a shape-shifting Siren who, for some strange reason, decides to retaliate by seducing them while in the guise of a male FBI agent. Does she know something we don't?

The Hardy Boys Might As Well Kill Themselves

After School Special - Our Intrepid Heroes head back to dear old Truman High School -- home of the Bombers, don't you know -- to investigate a mysterious rash of grisly student-on-student murders, but it's really just an excuse for Sam to drag Dean into a reexamination of their shared miserable past and how that wretched existence still affects them both to this day, and it's all just too depressing for words.

ACTOR Jensen Ackles

Spoilers ONLY; NO DISCUSSION ALLOWED: Just The Facts, Ma'am.

Supernatural In The Media: We're Legitimate Reporters. We Swear!

ACTOR Jared Padalecki

Shout at the Devil: The Meet Market (old)

The Supernatural Fan Fiction Thread: Nightmare Fodder

Ratings and Scheduling Issues: I Can't Do This Alone

Dean Winchester: Hotter Than Hell! Bitch.

"Bitch." "Jerk.": Brotherly Bonds

The Meet Market: Roadhouse Blues