Back in the fern-filled coastal rain forest of central South Dakota, Lily The Lesbian pushes her way through the pines until a moppet's disembodied laughter emanates from somewhere further within the surrounding trees. DUN!
Meanwhile, Sam finds a discarded steamer trunk, and riffles through its contents until he finds a Bowie knife almost as ginormous as he is. And in something I totally brushed past the first time through this episode, he rises from the trunk to find Ava clutching at her temples and groaning a bit. When he asks if she's okay, she nods her head around, explaining the slight spell away as dizziness brought on by lack of food. And because I accepted that answer even though I initially thought she might have been receiving an uncontrolled premonition, or something, I completely forgot all about it until just now. Stupid me. Stupid, stupid me. In any event, the two commiserate about their current situation for a bit until dear little gay stoner Andy calls out to announce he's found something. They join G.I. Jake below as Andy comes bounding out of the kitchen with two massive bags of rock salt hoisted above his head. Aw. He's so giggly and excited and adorable and doomed. "Demian, you naughty thing! Spoiler!" Oh. Ooops! Sam's about to gather the group into a single, salt-encircled room for the duration, of course, when he suddenly notices The Lesbian's absence. Ava and Sam call out her name, and I mention it only because Katharine Isabelle's all girly with the shouting and such, and then Jared Padalecki busts out this bellowing, manly howl, and it just...I mean...he's all...and the...woof! Moving along, then: The two are answered only by a moppet's disembodied laughter emanating from somewhere outdoors, so all four of our super-special mommy-free and -having kids scurry outside onto the porch to find...a dead lesbian! Raoul? "Please! She's just hanging from the town's windmill, for heaven's sake! You think I'm going to waste a 'GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!' on that?!" Quite right, my scaly friend, and it's well you shouldn't, for despite Ava's abjectly terrified reaction to it all, Lily The Lesbian really is just dangling there from a noose, and where's the fun in that? "Especially after Gary Cole was so delightfully flailing and jerking about not three weeks ago!" The point is yours, Raoul, so let's keep this going, shall we?