Supernatural
Bitten

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: B- | 15 USERS: B+
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Found Footage

We're over five minutes into this thing at this point, with nary a monster around, besides the green beast of jealousy. This is like the long party scene at the start of Cloverfield where everybody wishes that guy a happy journey to Japan and we in the audience get to know everybody as human beings so that we care when they're inevitably dispatched by the monster. It showed us how mundane life can be turned on its head at any moment, but then it was kind of a huge relief when the monster finally showed up because, dang, it was getting boring up in there. That's what's going on right now with this episode. I am rooting for the monster to hurry up and start laying waste to these people's mundane lives.

Nerdy Friend takes the camera to their literature class. While the professor talks about the character Piggy in Lord of the Flies, Michael falls asleep. Nerdy Friend zooms in on the professor's lapel pin because he's magically prescient and knows it will be important later. Outside after class, Nerdy Friend and Blond Girl tease Michael about sleeping through the lecture. "Please tell me you taped it," Michael says. "Come on, who loves you?" Nerdy Friend asks by way of answering. "I wish I could quit you," Michael jokes. He moves in to hug his friend, but is foiled when some guy barges between them on his way down the stairs. The camera and Nerdy Friend both fall to the ground. "Watch it, asshat!" Michael shouts after the interloper. The interloper comes back, chest all puffed out like an angry little monkey. "What did you call me?" He tries to sound all threatening, but he looks pretty tiny next to burly Michael. Some friend has to pull him away before he gets his ass whooped.

As the three friends walk through the campus, they notice a hubbub up ahead. Other students rush past them. Police sirens wail in the distance. They come upon a crime scene that's been taped off. Nerdy Friend wants to film whatever is going on, but Blond Girl doesn't think that would be legal. He catches sight of a body, covered with a sheet bearing a large bloodstain about midway up the torso. An old Chevy Impala rumbles into the scene and two devastatingly handsome FBI agents get out. They are, of course, Sam and Dean, but we're seeing them through the lens and eyes of these college kids. Blond Girl has her own camera out. "Someone was murdered on campus? You guys live two blocks from here," she says. "Look, Starsky and Hutch," says Nerdy Friend, gesturing toward the Winchesters. "Rizzoli and Isles," Michael corrects him. (Somewhere, Crowley is jotting these down in his Moleskine to use later.) Sam whips out a badge to show to the detective on the scene. "Special Agent Rose," he introduces himself, then gestures to Dean: "This is Special Agent Hudson." The detective gives Sam and Dean the details of the incident: A woman who lives upstairs heard something like growling, as from a coyote, and came downstairs to find her neighbor dead. "Awesome," Dean says.

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Supernatural

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