Episode Report Card
Demian: D | 3 USERS: A-
Clap Your Hands If You Believe…

Later that evening, Sam tracks down Dean's abandoned cell, and he wanders entirely unmolested through the cornfield for a very lengthy period of time until he emerges into a clearing currently populated by a gaggle of UFO-chasing idiots, plus Robert Picardo. Whose character name I have already forgotten. "As have I!" Give it a rest, Raoul -- you totally weren't paying attention to that scene in the first place. "Curses! I have been found out! Hee!" Well, at least you're still awake. "Not for very much longer, if this dreadful installment maintains its dreary pace!" Well, maybe something good'll happen in the next couple of minutes. "Hooray!" Though I very much doubt it. "Rats!" Now, where the hell was I? Oh, yes: This hideously boring scene. Sam arrives at the impromptu idiot campground to find several stupid hippies regaling each other with that cloying five-tone alien theme from Close Encounters Of The Third Kind. He wisely avoids all of them in favor of ambling over to this evening's primary guest star, whom he curtly greets with, "So, they're real -- UFOs?" Robert Picardo smiles something dumb by way of response, but Soulless Sammy doesn't have time for any of his dippy bullshit, and immediately gets down to business by demanding, "How do I get 'em?" Robert Picardo's all, "I beg your pardon?" so Sam barks, "You hunt ETs, right? I need to know how to get them." "You and me both," Robert Picardo grins again, passing Sam an utterly useless leaflet.

"This is it?" Sam snorts. Robert Picardo babbles something annoying about thirty years' worth of eyewitness accounts counting as proof, but No-Nonsense Sammy cuts him off with, "My brother was abducted, so I'm pretty good on the proof part." He's about to demand more pertinent information, but that stringy-haired hippie chick from earlier in the hour accidentally-on-purpose overheard his last statement, and she uses this as an excuse to insert herself into the action. No-Nonsense Sammy basically ignores her (for the moment) in favor of sneering the following at Robert Picardo: "So, you've been hunting UFOs for over three decades, and you basically have no concrete data and zero workable leads. Have you considered the possibility that you suck at hunting UFOs?" Love, I'm telling you. I'm in love. They can keep Sam's soul in that goddamned cage if this magnificent creature is the trade-off. Of course, now that I've said that, he'll likely be reensouled by the end of the next evil episode, because this show hates me and wants me dead. In any event, No-Nonsense Sammy stalks off in a snit, but that stringy-haired hippie chick skitters after him to offer her assistance -- if you know what she means, and I think you do -- so No-Nonsense Sammy gives her a smirk, and the two head off in search of somewhere private. You know, so they can do it. "Dirty!"

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