Episode Report Card
Demian: B | 5 USERS: A+
Oh, Hardy Boys, Do You Know What That's Worth?

...The Garden, which is supposed to resemble The Cleveland Botanical Garden because that's the only arboretum Our Dead Heroes ever visited during their violently deprived childhoods. Unfortunately, anyone with even the most rudimentary of Googling skills can tell you it's actually The Bloedel Floral Conservatory in Vancouver's Queen Elizabeth Park, so whatever, Supernatural. In any event, the reason the boys perceive The Garden as they do is because each individual sees what he or she expected to see at the center of Heaven, if that makes any sense. "It certainly does not!" I wasn't talking to you, lizard! "Hmph!" ANY-way, Joshua confirms his identity, and reveals that God's actually in Red Bank, New Jersey, playing skee ball on the boardwalk. "Can you get Him a message for us?" Sam asks. "Actually," Joshua replies, "he has a message for you: 'Back off.'" Dean's all, "Excuse me?" so Joshua kindly goes into more detail. "He knows already -- everything you want to tell Him, He knows what the angels are doing, He knows that The Apocalypse has begun. He just doesn't think it's His problem." Dean's all, "Excuse me?" so Joshua sternly lays it on the line. "He saved you already." Sam and Dean gape. "He put you on that plane," Joshua emphasizes. "He brought back Castiel, He granted you salvation in Heaven -- and after everything you've done, too!" That last bit was specifically directed towards Sam, who looks deeply ashamed, despite the fact that I never have and never will care about the goddamned hosts the goddamned demons shoved aside in order to possess all of those goddamned human bodies goddamned Crackie The Crackheaded Crack-Crack snacked upon. So there. Joshua, ignoring me, points out that "it's more than He's intervened in a long time," so Sam, Dean, and My Sweet Baboo should just shut up about it already, "magic amulet or not." "But He can stop it!" Dean protests. "But He won't," Joshua reiterates. "Why not?" Dean spits. "Why does He allow evil in the first place?" Joshua lobs back, and not unkindly. "You could drive yourself nuts asking questions like that," Joshua reminds the boys. Dean's furious, and rages something about "another deadbeat dad with a bunch of excuses," and YOU ARE THIRTY-ONE YEARS OLD, DEAN. GET OVER YOUR GODDAMNED DADDY ISSUES ALREADY. GOD! "Were you not paying attention?! The Eternal Firebeast refuses to answer, you silly little man!"

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