Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: B | 5 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Oh, Hardy Boys, Do You Know What That's Worth?

Dead Sammy immediately starts rifling through The Winchester Bar And Grill's many, many cabinet drawers in search of anything remotely road-like, and eventually digs up and old Route 66 postcard. "I've seen this somewhere before," Sam admits, and the next thing we know, the camera's plunged into...

...and out of that postcard to whisk Our Dead Heroes into another of Sam's fondest memories, this one dating back to the time he ran away by himself to Flagstaff, Arizona, while Dean was supposed to be watching him. Naturally, Pissy Dead Deano works his boxer-briefs into a mighty wad over this one, too, because he caught hell when Sucky John returned to find Wee Sam missing, and how could that be one of Sam's bestest memories, huh? HUH? Fortunately, before I launch another handful of Raoul's wriggly snacks at the television screen, Little Lord Pissypants spots a WORK CREW AHEAD sign on the door and bolts for the expected axis mundi outside. After a moment, a slightly chastened Sam follows to find himself...

...stranded with Dean in the middle of a midnight backwoods lane somewhere, surrounded by apple trees with a long-abandoned house just adjacent, so this must be where they met The Tin Man back in Season Three. In one of the lost episodes. "Because of the strike!" That's it, Raoul. Because of the strike.

Oh, kidding! Raoul and I are just kidding. Though, you know, if that actually had happened, Dean would definitely have been the Dorothy, because of his -- ahem -- eminent stature. "Hee!" Anyway, Dean quickly realizes they landed in yet another of Sam's favorite memories, this the night he walked out on the family business to go to Stanford, and oh, my holy God. ENOUGH WITH THE SCREAMING, YOU STUMPY LITTLE PISSY-PANTSED BITCH! You're thirty-one GODDAMNED years old, for Christ's sake! GET OVER IT ALREADY! The Stumpy Little Pissy-Pantsed Bitch doesn't listen to me, because The Stumpy Little Pissy-Pantsed Bitch NEVER LISTENS TO ME, and CHRIST, I'm going to have a goddamned ANEURYSM. "Oy!" shrieks Raoul, for all this useless angst has left him feeling like a Jewish grandmother. "The tsuris!" I know, my scaly friend. I know. Hey, here's an idea -- "Yes?!" Why don't you hit flagon duty a little early tonight? "Really!?" Really. "But I wouldn't want to miss a thing!" What's to miss? There's no more violence or gore for the rest of the episode. "You mean they...?! They just...!?" Go on. "They just...talk to each other?!" Yep. "Well! You don't have to ask me twice!" And with that, the dear little dizzy little cold-blooded thing scootches to the floor from atop his overstuffed armchair and waddles on back to his den to whip us up copious amounts of healing booze. God knows I'm gonna need it after this episode.

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Supernatural

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