Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: C | 2 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys Meet The Lost Boys

Previously: Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad. Dad is gone! Should we find Dad? Do you love Dad? Dad hates me! No, Dad doesn't hate me! Yes, sir! Let's fight. Daddy, Daddy, DADDY!

Establishing shot of a rockin' roadside bar in Manning, Colorado. Cut to a close-up of a hand flipping through what looks like the Winchester Notebook of Despair, but we quickly realize this notebook is being mumbled over by an old guy we've never seen before. A nice lady bartender asks if "Mr. Elkins" wants another beer. While getting that beer, she exposits an explanation to a man sitting across the bar who thinks this Elkins looks like the Unabomber. Lady Bartender tells him that Elkins is just an old man who lives all alone "up the canyon" and that he spends all day in the bar going over his papers and making notes. In other words: obviously misunderstood demon hunter.

A crowd of no-good toughs busts through the door to the bar, and gets the requisite Bad Guys crotch-shot-camera-angle welcome. The head of the pack is a Mimi Rogers-esque woman in a black leather jacket. Elkins peers at them suspiciously. And then does that a little more. Lady Bartender asks what they want to drink, and it turns out that they want "Jack all around. Leave the bottle." When asked if they want any food, we are treated to the ludicrously gratuitous "No. We have dinner plans." And Supernatural will take your "foreshadowing" and raise you a mallet to the head. Lady Bartender reaches for the Jack and asks if Elkins needs anything else (hella good service in this bar! Alcoholics from miles around come to enjoy the ministrations of this bartender and her one drink per minute rate of service) but as she turns around she notices he's left mysteriously.

Elkins rushes into his cabin, only to get inside and find Mimi Rogers, who is clearly a vampire (a Mimpire?). She approaches him slowly and with extremely volumized long dark hair. She tells him he looks old, and he responds in kind: by whipping a knife into her heart. Her eyes glow in the dark as she says, "Damn. You can do better than that," and easily slides the knife back out of her chest. Elkins takes off through the door behind him; Mimpire stalks after him. Elkins does the requisite shoving of the bookshelf in front of the door while anxiously trying to get into a safe he has behind his desk. He opens the safe and pulls out an old gun box, and then we have to watch him put the gun together and frantically load it with the bullets in the gun box. I wasn't aware I was watching Charlton Heston's Old-Timey Gun Fetish cable-access vanity project. In between each bullet going into its slot we get a shot of the bookshelf shimmying as Mimpire tries to beat down the door. Bullets, door, bullets, door, until he finally wings the barrel of the gun around, ready to take Mimpire on, except at that exact moment two more vampires drop (verrry slowwwly and very clearly on stunt wires) in through the skylights and pounce on him. Mimpire walks slowly some more, picks up the gun, caresses it a bit, gives her boy vampire cronies the go-ahead, and we cut to an exterior shot of the house and Elkins's screams. Zappy credits.In a diner, Sam works on the Goth girl laptop while Dean peruses the newspaper. Dean can't find any leads "in all of Nebraska" so I guess that's where they are. Sam's scanning other western states but isn't finding much, except an Iowan woman who "fell ten thousand feet and survived." Dean responds that that "sounds more That's Incredible than The Twilight Zone." Both Padalecki and Ackles are delivering their lines in a hushed, subdued tone, like they've got Peter Fallow raw egg sloshing around in the brain hangovers. Dean suggests they just "keep heading east" and then starts teasing Sam about going back to New York to see Sarah. Sam is, however, still wearing his chastity belt, which cuts off all blood flow below his chin, so he reminds Dean of all the work they have to do. He reads something else off the computer about Daniel Elkins being found mauled in his home. Dean mutters to himself that the name is familiar and starts flipping through the Winchester Diary of Mad, Black Demons while Sam blabs on about the mysterious killing. The strings swell as Dean hands the diary over to Sam and shows him the Colorado phone number listed next to "Daniel Elkins."

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Supernatural

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