This Week's Motel Room, the following morning. Our Intrepid Idiots are just returning from their merry late-night round of grave desecration, and wouldn't you know it? The latest victim's death has already made the paper -- and on the front page, no less! That's some incredibly quick editorial turnaround time, there. In any event, despite the brutal nature of what the paper describes as "a wild animal attack," none of the diner's patrons saw the wild animal in question, and the 911 operator claimed to hear nothing aside from the panic-stricken gent screaming at her. Super-Smart Sammy deploys his mad Googling skillz to dig up a little more information on the deceased, and it turns out this "Christopher Fisher" person was arrested five years ago for "running a dog-fighting operation." "So, what?" Dean grumps, mightily annoyed with the entire situation because lest we've forgotten, Something's Not Quite Right With Dreary El Deano This Evening. "He causes so much misery," Dean continues, referring of course to The Late, Unlamented Mr. Fisher, "that some Rottweiler goes Cujo on him from beyond the grave?" "Do dogs even have ghosts?" he wonders briefly before getting all judgmental and announcing that The Late, Unlamented Mr. Fisher "had it coming." "Maybe not," Sam counters, furrowing his mighty brow as his mad Googling skillz proceed to unearth the following bit of mitigating detail: After The Late, Unlamented Mr. Fisher received probation for his crimes, he threw himself into volunteering for an animal shelter, raising tens of thousands of dollars to upgrade the shelter's facilities while placing countless abandoned pets with new owners. D'OH!

Moments later -- and after an immense and strenuous amount of bitchery from Dean that I'll not be bothering to transcribe because I really, really don't care that Something's Not Quite Right With Dreary El Deano This Evening -- we arrive outside the WAYNE COUNTY CORONER'S OFFICE, where Dapper Sam emerges onto the sidewalk to join his equally dapper brother in a chat about the particulars of The Late, Unlamented Mr. Fisher's corpse. Long story short, Dapper Sam found red dirt under the corpse's nails, which means both victims must have been wandering around the same dusty red place just before they died, which means Our Intrepid Idiots must climb into the Impala for a drive out to an abandoned apple orchard, because according to Sam, "whatever's in red dirt makes great apples." Just go with it. And as Dreary El Deano unleashes yet another immense and strenuous amount of bitchery...a panic-stricken elderly gentleman races out in front of their car! DUN! Like, literally this time. It's on the soundtrack and everything. Dean stomps on the brakes to avoid hitting the guy and, long story short, Our Intrepid Idiots invite the panic-stricken elderly gent back to...