Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: C+ | 2 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys And The Case Of The Idiot Children

Anyway, John Wayne Gacy waves at the little girl, who flaps her hand around by way of response while drawing her mother's attention to her new friend. Neither Mom Of Nora nor Dad Of Nora can see John Wayne Gacy. DUN! MON, amused, smiles, "What are you trying to do, scare your father?" Nora sort of half-grins in reply, but looks puzzled when she sees that John Wayne Gacy's no longer standing by the truck.

Night. The Family Of Nora cruises down a lonely two-lane highway, on their way home. DON's driving, MON's asleep in the passenger seat, and Nora's glancing out the side window just in time to spot John Wayne Gacy waving at her from the side of the road. "Look, Mom!" Nora cries. "The clown!" MON snaps her eyes open and blinks around for a bit, but Nora dejectedly notes, "You missed him." MON smiles distractedly as The Plaintive Yet Spooky Piano Of This Family Won't Be Enjoying Each Other's Company For Much Longer PING-PING-PING-PINGs and we cross-fade to...

...Nora's bedroom, later that evening. Just as she's about to drift off, the child hears rustling noises coming from outdoors through her open window and sits up in her bed to eye the massive clown-shaped shadow now appearing on her ceiling. She pads silently to her window to find John Wayne Gacy jingling his little clown bells at her on the lawn below. RUN, NORA, RUN! Unfortunately, Nora's just as insanely stupid as every other child we'll be meeting this evening, so she ignores me in favor of darting downstairs in her little preadolescent nightie to escort the pedophile serial killer right into her home! God, I hate kids. Nora clicks open the lock, swings wide the door, and takes John Wayne Gacy's hand in her own to ease him across the threshold and into...

...RAAAWWWR! The new flaming opening credits! "Eeeeeeeee!" shrieks The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon. With delight!

We crawl out of the blackness that follows the flames of the credits to find...more flames, actually. Daddy Shut Up's enshrouded corpse lies upon a bier atop a fiery pyre, and as the camera pans down from an overhead to the body's level, we can see Sam and Dean standing side-by-side on the opposite end of the clearing. I'll not be wondering how they managed to snatch away their father's corpse from the proper authorities, nor will I be wondering how they managed to pull off this middle-of-the-night DIY cremation without said authorities slinging their tantalizing asses into jail, because these are The Winchester Boys, and they can do anything. Sam's a watery-eyed emotional wreck, as one would expect, and Dean appears to be made of stone, which, you know, go figure. All is quiet save for the crackling of the fire until Sam at long last manages to choke out, "Before it...before he...did he say anything to you? About anything?" Dean takes a long moment before whispering, "No." LIAR! "Nothing," he mutters further, ignoring me. BIG, FAT, LYING LIAR! Sammy bites his lower lip and dissolves into a series of silent sobs as Dean stares stoically into the flames until -- wait for it -- one perfect tear drops from his right eye. Dean's a fucking pussy, y'all.

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Supernatural

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