...Soulless Sammy sneaks into Undead Zombie Grandpa's S&M Party Van, fiddles with one of Undead Zombie Grandpa's cell phones, and...

...rejoins Dreary El Deano back at the Impala, because Soulless Sammy LIED to Undead Zombie Grandpa about breaking up with his brother. "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!" Well, obviously, Raoul. "Samuel didn't take the bait," Soulless Sammy exposits while whipping open his trusty laptop, "so I went with Plan B." "We had a Plan B?" Dreary El Deano dimly squints. Soulless Sammy ignores that to explain, "I fired up the GPS on one of his cell phones -- we should be able to track him right to the Alpha." "The old man won't notice?" Dreary El Deano dumbs. "Trust me," Soulless Sammy assures his egregiously stupid brother while tapping away furiously at his keyboard, "he thinks Velcro is big news." A few whirrs and Pings! later, and Soulless Sammy's pinpointed the super-secret interrogation complex's coordinates, and the next thing we know, we've arrived at...

...a misty and disused warehouse somewhere remote. Undead Zombie Grandpa's S&M Party Van wheels up to the warehouse door, and Undead Zombie Grandpa and Parker Lewis hop out to head inside. Soulless Sammy and Dreary El Deano sneak up after them to discover that Undead Zombie Grandpa and Parker Lewis have locked the warehouse door behind themselves, so Dreary El Deano rummages about his jacket pockets for his lock-picking tools while Soulless Sammy makes note of the Dead Man's Blood smeared all over the entrance. And don't ask me how goddamned Dead Man's Blood smeared all over a goddamned door is supposed to repel The Alpha Vampire's goddamned redneck underlings when the Dead Man's Blood needs to be injected into the goddamned vampires' goddamned veins to have any effect on them, because I don't have a goddamned answer for you. Dreary El Deano picks the locks, and the two unsheathe their freshly sharpened machetes to tippy-toe through the warehouse's generalized and drippy gloom until Parker Lewis emerges from a room at the far end of a hall, at which point Our Soulless And/Or Dreary Heroes duck into a conveniently located hidey-hole until Parker Lewis disappears.

Once that particular annoyance has passed by, Soulless Sammy and Dreary El Deano scurry up to the room Parker Lewis had so recently vacated and peer inside to find Undead Zombie Grandpa interrogating The Alpha Vampire. By the way, The Alpha Vampire's been locked inside a cage, within which he's further been strapped and chained to an old electric chair. His hands and feet are run through with nails attached to the main generator, and he's got a couple of Frankenstein-like bolts jutting from his neck that are hooked up to tubes currently flooding his veins with Dead Man's Blood. Just so you know. "Where is it?" Undead Zombie Grandpa demands. "How do we find it?" The Alpha Vampire answers Undead Zombie Grandpa's questions with a smiling silence, so Undead Zombie Grandpa activates the generator -- which is probably about sixty years old, given the way the damn thing creaks and wheezes to life -- to shoot a few thousand volts through The Alpha Vampire's body. "Ouch. Stop. That hurts," The Alpha Vampire deadpans as blue sparks dance across his body. Frustrated, Undead Zombie Grandpa shuts the ancient generator down and bluffs something dull before storming from the room.