In any event, Dreary El Deano tippy-toes across The Alpha Vampire's expensively landscaped front lawn, dodging corpses both human and vampiric until he finally arrives at the manse's glass doors. One of the earlier soon-to-be-dead human extras appears in the glass for the briefest of moments before getting her soon-to-be-dead self dragged back into the depths of the manse, and a spurting gout of her freshly released arterial spray splatters against the inside of the doors just as the METAL TEETH CHOMP! barrels in to drag us all into this tedious evening's very first commercial break. This fucking episode is never going to end, is it? "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!"

The Alpha Vampire's Expensively Landscaped Front Lawn. Immediate aftermath. Dreary El Deano backs away from the blood-spattered glass doors until he hears shouts coming from the other side of the house, so he tippy-toes around the corner and arrives just in time to watch as Undead Zombie Grandpa, Soulless Sammy, and Parker Lewis shove the hooded and manacled Alpha Vampire into the back of Undead Zombie Grandpa's S&M Party Van. Dreary El Deano endures yet another pointless flashback to The Alpha Vampire's earlier vision -- this a flash of The Alpha Vampire's unique manicure strategy as mentioned above -- but he recovers in time to slip away before Soulless Sammy spots him loitering about the premises when he should be back at the trucks with Girl Campbell.

Meanwhile, back at said trucks, Girl Campbell impatiently cools her heels until Dreary El Deano sneaks back through the underbrush just as Undead Zombie Grandpa arrives with Soulless Sammy, Parker Lewis, and the few remaining soon-to-be-dead extras who have yet to be slaughtered. To her credit, Girl Campbell covers for Dreary El Deano, then wonders how the whole hunt thing went. "Rough," is Undead Zombie Grandpa's curt and euphemistic reply before he bright-sides, "but one Alpha down!" "Where is it?" Dreary El Deano too-innocently wonders, claiming he wants to pay the supposedly dead beast his "last respects." "Bring marshmallows," Undead Zombie Grandpa grumps before LYING that The Alpha Vampire's "already on the pyre." The posse embarks in its various vans and pickups and Metallicars to leave, and before you know it, we've joined...