Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 1 USERS: C-
The Hardy Boys Meet Bristol Palin

Flutter, Flutter RAAAWWWR! "Eeeeeeeeeeeee!" shrieks Raoul, though not, judging from his tone, with his usual amounts of delight. "You have interpreted my tone correctly!" What gives, my scaly friend? Has the RAAAWWWR! at long last lost its charm for you? "Absolutely not!" Well, what, then? "It's those...those wings!" Oh, dear. Dare I ask? "You should! Now, as I've always said in the past, the only good Canadian goose is a dead Canadian goose...." I don't recall you saying that in the past. "Quiet! [Ahem!] As I've always said in the past, the only good Canadian goose is a dead Canadian goose...." Raoul, you have never, ever said that in the past, and we all know where you're going with this, and we all agree with you, I'm sure, but may I please continue? "Oh, poop!" Raoul pouts, two perfectly formed smoke rings huffing from his nostrils. "You never allow me so much as a moment for my political commentary!" Dude, what's political about an airplane shredding a flock of Canadian.... "NEVER!" Oh, Jesus.

Now, where the hell was I? Oh, yes: An artfully lit shot of the nighttime Impala emerges from the generalized gloom left by the title card's wake, and soon enough, the camera approaches close enough to the parked car to reveal Dashing El Deano burning a little of the midnight oil behind the wheel. As he intently pores over whatever reading material he's got clutched in his hands in the low beam of his flashlight, Darling Sammy stirs from his slumber in the back seat, sniffs around for a second, and gripes, "For fuck's sake, Dean, when the hell are you going to hose all the angel juice off the goddamned upholstery? It's been a month and a half already!" Or maybe Sam says nothing of the sort, and instead blinks himself awake to groan, "What're you doing?" Dean's looking for a job, of course, despite the fact that, as Sam notes, they "just finished a job two hours ago," and on top of that, Dean's had them "chasing cases nonstop for, like, a month now," and The Crankypants Antichrist would like to get some goddamned rest already, thank you very much. Dean, single-minded and therefore oblivious, simply wonders if Sam would like next to haul cookies to "Cedar Rapids, Tulsa, or Chi-Town," and he pronounces the latter with a hard "ch" sound, and between that and his earlier assertion that he told a demon to "stick it where the sun shines," I'm starting to think Dean's a complete fucking moron. "'Starting'?!" shrieks Raoul, and...point to the impressively fanged recapping companion, I suppose. "Thanks!" In any event, Sam claims that Dean's been "running on fumes" for quite some time, and goes on to stress -- correctly, I should add -- "You can't run forever." "And what am I running from?" Dean snottily snaps back. Sam rolls his eyes and heaves a poor little dejected sigh before gently reminding his brother, "From what you told me, or are we pretending that never happened?" And Sam, honey, you know I love you and your enormous self to bits, but if Dean spilled his guts to you about spilling other people's guts in Hell nearly two months ago, and if this is the first time since then either of you have bothered to address it in conversation, then I'm guessing the answer to your question is "yes." Yes, you are pretending that never happened, so just shut up and ride shotgun like a good little Ginormotron over to Stratton, Nebraska, which is where the inbred old coot from the pre-credits sequence bit it, okay? "Okay!" I wasn't talking to you, Raoul. "Ooops! Hee!" I swear to God...

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP