Gah. ANY-way, where the hell was I? A-ha: The boys continue wandering through the supposedly deserted place, and Darling Sammy's briefly enthused over his trusty EMF reader's encouraging VWEEE-YORPs until Dean pisses all over Darling Sammy's parade by pointing out the nearby overhead power lines. They wander over to a closet to tangle their feet up in a red herring, but that's not important right now, because what is important right now is that Our Intrepid Heroes must deal with the family full of Monster Chow that's arriving below with a moving van. "Uh-oh," Sam gulps, for he'd been under the mistaken impression the house was still on the market. Sorry! Better research next time, boys!
"Oh, honey, isn't it just perfect?" I'm sure the mother coos to the father as the adolescent special-needs son gambols happily in the yard with the family dog, and the teenaged daughter gripes about cell phone reception while the probably-gay uncle agrees with his sassy niece that living in the middle of nowhere sucks (and not in the good way), and if that lineup of characters sounds like a hot scrambled mess of pop-culture clichés to you, you're right, and if you think I made any of it up, you are so very, very, very wrong, and this episode just got about three thousand hours longer than it actually is. They even named the fucking dog "Buster," for Christ's sake. I must note, however, that the mother is being played by noted 1980s lesbian icon and infamous Supergirl portrayer Helen Slater, and...that's all I really have to say about that, as it turns out. Well, you know, aside from the fact that I now feel really old. "Only just now?!" Raoul shrieks, and this I know I have always said in the past: Watch that goddamned forked tongue of yours, houseguest. "Hee!"












