Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: C | 5 USERS: B-
A Steaming Pile of Cacao

He's walking through a park with his dog, frantically calling for Amelia. The look of it is all too bright, overexposed, surreal and dreamlike. It is the Instagram of flashbacks. Eerie music plays. The dog runs off. Sam chases after him and finds him in a clearing with Amelia and a picnic basket. "Happy birthday!" she says, throwing her arms open. The music turns into soaring notes of happiness. "What is this?" he asks, nearly crying. "You've never seen a birthday cake before?" she asks, incredulous. He's so stunned he can't even say anything. In the present day, the soaring notes of happiness fade into a solitary horn of melancholy as Sam blinks away tears. If this goes on all season, we'll all be in tears. Tears of complete and utter boredom.

Tippi Blevins has been possessed by a recapping demon. Send holy water to, or chant spells at her on Twitter: @TippiB.

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