Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: C | 4 USERS: C+
A Steaming Pile of Cacao

Jogging enthusiast Paul Hayes jumps Sam from behind and smashes a chair over his back. Any normal back would suffer mightily, but Sam's got the Great Wall of backs so he just kind of stumbles. Paul grabs him and throws him across the floor. Dean finally reaches for his gun, but Paul swats it out of his hand. He punches Dean right in his pretty face. Dean falls right into the guy from Phoenix we haven't met until now. Dean punches him a couple of times, but the guy doesn't even flinch. He lifts Dean over his head like a pro wrestler and flips him over onto his back. He and Paul hold Dean down against the stage floor. "You guys are stronger than you look," Dean grunts. "Comes with the package," Paul says. "Plus, I work out a lot!" He still sounds so friendly, too. Randa straddles Dean and blah-blahs about what a shy little thing she used to be before her heart transplant. "Now I'm freaking Xena: Warrior Princess!" She says sacrificing to Cacao is even better than sex. "So, if I go real slow, take my time and enjoy this, I can show you your own beating heart before you die." She pushes her fingers through the many layers of Dean's shirts. Blood wells up beneath her fingertips. Dean groans in agony.

Sam hops up behind Paul and bashes him in the head with a glass bottle. Paul lets go of Dean so that he can deal with his attacker. His hand now free, Dean reaches for his knife and stabs Randa through the heart. As she stumbles away from him, her heart goes up in flames. Little puffs of sympathy smoke go up from Paul and Phoenix guy's heart. Both men fall to the floor. Randa's heart burns and burns until the SFX budget runs out and then she fizzles and drops onto the stage. Dean rolls around a bit, clasping his chest, trying to catch his breath. He should probably go to the hospital. Even if Randa didn't succeed in ripping out his heart, she still poked through skin and muscle. Not to mention his shirts will never be the same.

Denouement. Sam and Dean stop by Eleanor-Betsy's to let her know it's finally all over. "I half thought you might fail," she says, "and Randa would come after me. Either way, I'd finally be at peace." For some reason, the Winchesters chuckle ever so slightly at that. Maybe it's a laugh of understanding, of knowing what it's like to be so accepting of one's terrible fate as long as it meant one could finally rest. Maybe they're just so glad that this lame story is over that they can't help but be a little giddy.

They hit the road, heading for whatever the next case may be. "Wow, back in business," Dean says, because heaven forbid they drive in silence for a while. "Got the win. Admit it -- it feels good." Sam says nothing, so Dean keeps talking. He says he relates to Randa feeling like a warrior. But does he feel like a warrior princess? Sam says he doesn't feel the same way and maybe he never did. "When this over, when we close up shop on Kevin and the tablet, I'm done," he says. Dean doesn't believe him, or doesn't want to. Sam talks about having a normal life last year for the first time, conveniently forgetting the years he spent in college. "I want that... I had that," Sam says. "I think that's just how you feel right now," Dean says. Oh, good Lord. Just drop him off at the next town and pick up Benny. Sam pouts out the window as the rainy night outside gives way to a flashback.

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