Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: B+ | Grade It Now!
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The Hardy Boys Do the Zelda Rubenstein Thing

Commercials. Trunk of the Metallicar creaks open as Dean grabs a shotgun and an axe. People have gathered outside to watch, and who wouldn't, because how many times do you get a front row seat for EVIL? Dean starts kicking in the door while inside we see Sam getting thrown around the kitchen in a quite convincingly terrible manner. Cut back to Dean having trouble with the door. Cut back to Sam getting to his feet, only to be flung backward and pinned against a wall, unable to move his hands or anything. Gravity rides everything, dude. Cut back to Dean finally having luck axing the door down. Cut back inside, where the Maternal Flame has started walking toward Sam while he remains motionless against the wall.

Dean stalks into the house with his gun ready and puts himself between Sam and the Maternal Flame. He raises the shotgun when Sam shouts, "No don't! I know who it is. I can see her now." Upon hearing this, the Maternal Flame ditches the fire get-up and stands before them, the same age and in the same nightgown she wore the night she was killed. Dean's arm shakes as he lowers the gun he had pointed at her, and he says simply, "Mom." She steps toward him with an inscrutable smirk on her face and says simply, "Dean." Dean starts to lose it. She moves past him to Sam and says, "Sam. I'm sorry." He asks, "For what?" and she looks confused and sad, and then does a little ghostly CGI turnaround move, looks up at the ceiling, and says, "You, get out of my house. And let go of my son," before going up in flames and disappearing. Sam is released, and Dean looks around for their re-disappeared mom in a heartbreaking manner. Sam declares, "Now it's over."Outside, daylight. Dean thanks Jenny for the trunk of photos she found in the basement. Sam sits on the front stoop as Missouri comes out and says, "Well, there are no spirits in there anymore this time for sure." She's just trying to cover her ass before the Poltergeist Exorcism Standards and Practices Committee comes after her for insufficient cleansing. Sam asks what happened, and Missouri psychic-wanks about energies canceling each other out and says that "your mom destroyed herself going after the thing...to protect her boys, of course." None of this makes sense, because why would she have to go after anything if the energies actually did cancel each other out? And I'd prefer to have a better explanation about why the mom and the poltergeist were both there at the same time. Did one attract the other? Has the mom always been there? There are some simple causal relationships that could have been set up to clarify these issues. And furthermore, SHUT UP, ME. Missouri apologizes to Sam for not believing him when he sensed the house wasn't clean. He asks her, "What's happening to me?" and Missouri ingenuously replies that she doesn't have all the answers. Guess she didn't get the memo about how sassy black women always have all the answers.

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Supernatural

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