Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B | Grade It Now!
The Hardy Boys Go From Wags To Witches

At their hotel room, Dean does some research on the computer, while Sam hits the books. Dean exposits that both victims are squeaky clean. "There's no reason for wicked bitch payback." Heh. Sam says, "Maybe because it's not about that." Dean says, "Wow, insightful." Sam suggests the witch is working a spell. "Check this out: 'Three blood sacrifices over three days; the last before midnight, on the final day of the final harvest'. Celtic calendar -- the final day of the final harvest is October 31st." Dean says, "Halloween?" Gosh, I miss Joss Whedon's dialogue. When's Dollhouse set to premiere? Sam explains the witch must be trying to summon the demon Samhain, which he pronounces Sam Hain, so that's what he'll be called throughout the recap. The name means nothing to Dean (perhaps because they're saying it WRONG and it is the name of a month, not a demon *sigh* I'll shut up and just go with their story). Sam says Sam Hain is the origin of Halloween.

Dear Wiccans and other Pagans, if you wave your hands really fast, you can pretend this didn't happen. Love, Cindy.

Sam says, "The Celts believed that October 31st was the one night of the year when the veil was thinnest between the living and the dead. And it was Sam Hain's night. Masks were put on to hide from him, sweets left on doorsteps to appease him, faces carved in pumpkins to worship him." The passive voice was over-used to bore him. Not to mention -- pumpkins are a New World fruit, Sammy Scholar. (The Celts carved their Samhain lanterns in turnips, and the like.) Sam Hain was exorcised centuries ago, but the traditions lived on. Sam emphasizes that there's heavy-duty witchcraft involved here. The ritual to raise Sam Hain can only be performed every 600 years -- and tomorrow night's the night. Sam says once Sam Hain is raised, he's going to raise all sorts of evil beings. Dean says, "So we're talking ghosts?" Sam says yes. "Zombies?" Yep. "Leprechauns?" Sam is exasperated. "Dean!" Dean says, "Those little dudes are scary. Small hands," and he makes little grabby motions with his right hand. The Dean Girls swoon. Sam gets serious. He's so cute when he's over-wrought. "Look. It just starts with ghosts and ghouls. This sucker keeps on going. By night's end, we are talking every awful thing we've ever seen. Everything we fight. All in one place." The music swells. Dean says, "It's going to be a slaughter house." Sam nods in all seriousness and readies himself for the METAL TEETH CHOMP!

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