Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: D- | 1745 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Do The Hardy Boys Dazzle You?

Bendy Estates, and Diseased El Deano must have picked up some zippy super-speed with those baby fangs and bat ears of his, because he made that 150-mile journey from Limestone to Cicero on foot in absolutely no time at all, didn't he? Whatever, Supernatural. Bendy Lisa's zonked out on her bed, and Diseased El Deano's watching her sleep like he's some abusive, controlling rapist from a wildly popular series of young adult romance novels, until Bendy Lisa somehow senses his presence and snaps awake. She switches on her bedside lamp, which pretty much blinds him, but he somehow manages to cover for it and perches next to her atop her expensive-looking duvet to make with his carefully worded goodbyes, as he fully expects to be decapitated within the next twenty minutes or so. She gets all up in his face about that, and this is a very bad move on Bendy Lisa's part, indeed, for Dean's brand-new throat-sucking instincts instantly get the better of him, and he tosses her up against the wall to pop some badly CGI'd fang. At the last second, however, he regains control of himself, and he barrels out of The Bendy Boudoir to... run smack into The Blood-Filled Brat out in the hall! DUN! "Stay back!" Dean shouts, slamming the kid out of his way before racing off down the stairs. Bendy Lisa, by now thoroughly freaked, drags The Brat into her boudoir, locking the door behind her as we jump back to...

...This Week's Motel Room, where Secretly Evil Sammy's just now letting Creepy Grandpa in from outdoors. "He's not himself, Sam!" Creepy Grandpa chides, referring of course to Diseased El Deano. "He's a monster, and he's hungry," Creepy Grandpa continues, opening his duffel to retrieve a pair of freshly sharpened machetes, "and we gotta prepare to do the right thing." "Told you he'd kill me when he showed up," Diseased El Deano mopes from his hiding place in the kitchenette, startling them both. Creepy Grandpa demands to know if Dean's fed yet. He hasn't, of course, and this is also of course Very Good News, because -- get this -- Creepy Grandpa's got a cure for vampirism. I can't...I don't even know where to...why do they think they can pull this sort of...oh, fuck it. "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!" Few are the times when I am honestly jealous of Raoul. "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!" This is one of those times.

Supernatural

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