Rattle, Rattle THE ROAD SO FAR! and yes, faithful friends and others, Supernatural now officially has itself a season-finale tradition, for barely has THE ROAD SO FAR! disappeared into the inky blackness of title card oblivion when the unmistakable opening wails of "Carry On Wayward Son" hit the soundtrack. Oh, Kansas. Even you have become a LYING LIAR WHO LIES, for The Brothers Winchester are never, ever going to get any goddamned rest, ever, now are they?

In any event, for those of you who either slept through the entire season or -- like me -- were too whacked out on Vicodin to remember much of the first half at all, join us as we delight in Dashing El Deano punching Darling Sammy's lights out in some random Motel Of The Week somewhere before one of our favorite pretty boys with guns blasts an off-screen monster in the face with rock salt. "VIOLENCE!" shrieks Raoul The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon whilst writhing about atop his overstuffed armchair with glee, for yes, gentle reader, this beautiful Previously sequence withholds not an instant of the good stuff, as we note in the very next shot, which features a bloody, conflicted, and remarkably broad-shouldered Sam immolating last October's rougarou. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Our Dear Boys make with the Tough Guy Jazz Hands somewhere dank and depressing for a moment until My Sweet Baboo sweeps down from Heaven to make Dean's acquaintance for the very first time, and it doesn't quite work out exactly the way Castiel had planned, what with the splinters of shattered glass slashing through the air around Dean's freshly washed face, so let's skip ahead a bit to Sam greeting the unquiet spirit of Special Agent Henriksen the only way Darling Sammy knows how, and oh, dear. Even when people try to be sociable on this show, it all ends in little more than gross misunderstandings and massive amounts of bloodshed and tears. "Hooray!" Quiet, Raoul. It takes long enough to get through these season finale flashback montages without your overexcited interjections every other line. "My apologies, I'm sure! Please continue!" I shall.