Supernatural

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Demian: A- | 7 USERS: A+
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No Rest For The Wicked

When we return, Lilith's ramping down her Super-Special Death-Ray Hand, and as it peters out, the irises of her eyes roll back into their proper place. She should have kept them rolled all the way into the back of her skull, though, for when they focus on what should be a bitty pile of Sam Ash on the floor, she finds instead the fully intact Ginormotron, cringing behind his hands. Hee. Sam eventually draws his arms away from his face and seems almost as freaked over this unexpected development as Lilith is. "Back!" she weakly cries out as our favorite looming portent of doom rises from the floor to bear down upon her tiny frame. "I said back!" Lilith ineffectually repeats as Sam stoops to retrieve The Knife That Can Kill Anything from where it had fallen during the previous scene. "I don't think so," Deadly Action Sammy sneers, drawing back his right arm to plunge the blade through Lilith's skull, apparently, judging from the angle he's working on, here. And then? Lilith snaps back her hostess's head and roars, expelling a foul and somewhat shrieky pillar of bitterly black demonic goo from that hostess's mouth. The pillar rockets upwards through a ceiling vent, and once it's gone, this dead blonde chick no one knows anything about flops down onto the floorboards next to Dead El Deano's rapidly cooling corpse, and oh my God. "What!? What did I miss?!" Oh, nothing --it's just that Jared Padalecki's an even sloppier crier than I remember him being. "Oh, poop! That's no fun at all!" Well, if it makes you feel any better, there's a bloody meat hook coming up in the next forty seconds. "Then why are you wasting our valuable time dithering about upon this tedious nonsense!? Get to the meat hooks, posthaste!" I'm tryin... "CHOP-CHOP!" Okay! Okay! So, the enormous slobbering puppy dog gets his big brother's pretty corpse all sticky and wet as he rocks it back and forth and promises to hug it and pet it and squeeze it and pat it and pet it and give it security and keep it warm like a mother hen so it never feels rejected or lack of love, and then the camera dives down into...

...Dean's luxuriously lashed doe eye? Buhznuh? And further and further it goes, down into the blackness of Dean's blank pupil, from which emerges a tightly constructed network of chains spread out across a background of varying patches of darkness and light, and from the distance at which we're looking at all of it, the entire visual closely resembles certain representations of the brain's neural network, particularly when flashes of lightning zip across the screen. Amidst the crashing thunder, we hear one single person screaming, and the camera spirals ever closer towards a Dean-like form that ends up actually being Dean (or some reasonable CGI facsimile thereof), stretched out and suspended at the center of one set of chains via the meat hooks embedded in his wrists, ankles, rib cage, and shoulder! "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" Are you happy now, Raoul? "Blissful! Thanks ever so!" Never a problem, my faithful lizardly companion. So, the camera eventually reaches Dean's heavily bloodied face, and the instant he screams, "SAAAAAAAM!" the screen snaps black, and we're left with nothing more than Dean's howl of terror echoing away into the distance as we head into what promises to be a most lengthy summer hiatus. "Eeeeeeeeeeeee! And kisses! Hiatus kisses to all of my pretties! Whee!"

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Supernatural

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