I seriously don't know where to begin with all of the awesomeness, so you'll have to forgive me if I ramble a bit.
The season finale opens about twenty-four hours before Dashing El Deano's time on earth expires, and we find Our Intrepid Heroes plus Bobby flying about in an understandable state of panic due to the rapidly approaching deadline. After Bobby works some fancy mojo to pinpoint Lilith's location in New Harmony, Indiana, several Lilith-related strategies are proposed and discarded before Darling Sammy sneaks off and summons Ruby the Sparkly-Haired Demon on his own. He believes they can off Lilith with Ruby's Knife That Can Kill Anything, you see, and hopes to persuade the sassy demonette to hand it over. Princess Sparkle is having none of that asinine plan, however, because she claims the only way they can defeat Lilith and save Dean's life is if Sam re-accesses his "dormant" abilities from last season to fry the terrifying little bitch. Dean arrives on the scene just as Sam's about to give in to the Dark Side or whatever, and after a supremely satisfying demonette-on-Winchester throwdown, Dean manages both to swipe The Knife and to ensnare Princess Sparkle in a devil's trap, so the boys plus Bobby head off to Indiana to spear themselves a little preadolescent nightmare.
And what, precisely, has that little preadolescent nightmare been up to in Hoosierland? Tormenting a suburban family, Twilight Zone-style, of course, abetted by an entire posse of minions stationed in and around the surrounding houses to stand guard while she indulges herself on a psychotic-demonic vacation. The boys plus Bobby and Princess Sparkle -- who has somehow managed to wriggle free from the trap -- make quick work of the posse, but just as Sam's about to gut the preadolescent nightmare's preadolescent host, Dean realizes Lilith's switched bodies. With time running out in the midst of their frantic search for Lilith's new form, Sam, Dean, and Ruby barricade themselves in a desperate attempt to keep the hellhounds at bay. And then?
Turns out Lilith has evicted Ruby from Princess Sparkle and proceeds to let the hellhounds in so they can actually, honest-to-God rip Dashing El Deano to shreds! I know! It is awesome. Unfortunately for Lilith, her Super-Special Death Ray Hand fails completely when deployed against Apparently Even Super-Specialer Action Sammy, and she flees Princess Sparkle's corpse so Darling Sammy can have himself a good long cry over Dean's. And then?
We dive down into actual, honest-to-God Hell to find Dashing El Deano poked through with meat hooks! AND THEN? Hiatus! God, Kripke sucks. And I totally want to marry him in California. See you in the fall, kids!
Rattle, Rattle THE ROAD SO FAR! Ah, Kansas. The unmistakable opening wails of "Carry On Wayward Son" hit the soundtrack as the Impala grumbles out of the blackness to roar towards the audience, and while I was worried about this song's overuse prior to the finale's airing -- especially after taking into account its disappointing appearance in last season's last episode -- I'm feeling better about it, especially now that I know there most certainly will not be peace for Our Intrepid Heroes when they are done tonight. So, as the song plays beneath -- and if I've got all of this right -- Our Dear And Soon To Be Sucking It Boys burst through a door to find an entire slothful family mummified on their sofa in front of a Dallas rerun before Deadly Action Sammy, as part of this season's most awesome kill, tightens a length of razor wire around Whackjob Gordon's neck until the latter's damn fool vampiric head pops right the hell off of his body. "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" shrieks Raoul The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon, writhing about with delight upon his overstuffed armchair, for he's always happy to witness that excellent scene all over again. "Indeed!" In the far less impressive sequences that follow, Dashing El Deano plunges The Knife That Can Kill Anything (And Actually Does) repeatedly into Demonic Piper's back before both of these strapping young gentlemen blast a few rounds of rock salt into the unfortunate possessed of Monument, Colorado. Darling Sammy ruefully and guiltily sneaks sad little side glances at his doomed yet defiant brother for a bit, and Dean endures an acid flashback that somehow involves both Mama Cass and an incredibly bendy yoga instructor on a picnic blanket before he aerates some vampire's skull with The Fucking Colt That Can Kill Anything Except When It Usually Can't. As the song's opening lyrics give way to the initial instrumental bits, we're reminded of the deal Dean made with the delightful Ona Grauer in last season's finale, and also of Darling Sammy's failed attempt to cancel said deal by shooting Jared Padalecki's adorable fiancée in the face. Demonic Piper resurrects her dead ass to chit-chat about The Wicked Witch Of The West, and Ruby's off-camera sneer introduces everyone to Lilith just as that preadolescent monstrosity's eyes flip a milky, opaque white as she raises one of her creepy preadolescent hands to flood a tiny Colorado precinct house with a horribly brilliant light.