Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: B- | 1 USERS: B
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The Hardy Boys Resolve to Exorcise More

Praise Allah, Hallelujah, and Shalom, we pan up on Jensen as he slumbers face-down on a bed wearing little shorts. Unnecessary strings wail in the background as we hear keys fiddling in the lock, and then see a large figure looming behind this weird glass-brick wall between the door to the motel room and the room proper. Dean's eyes snap open, and the strings continue to wail even though the one-celled organisms living in the dust on my television know it's just Sam. There's no need to start every scene with a little mini...SURPRISE!, is my opinion on the subject. Sam comes into the room holding coffee and says, "Mornin', sunshine!" as Jensen pushes his chest off the bed, craning his neck backward, in a total beefcake pose. Then Jensen's thighs move this way. Then Jensen's thighs move that way. Then Jensen's thighs decide to get out of bed. I'm thinking this would not be a bad way to continue the recap. What are Jensen's thighs doing? WWJTD? Anyhoo, it is a quarter to six in the morning, and Dean remarks that when he woke up at 3 AM, Sam was watching "the George Foreman infomercial," and then asks Sam when he last got a good night's sleep. When Sam says, "It's no big deal, but I appreciate your concern," Dean does his tough guy act and retorts that he isn't concerned, he just wants his brother "sharp," the better to fight the bad guys. Then Dean loses the tough-guy act and asks Sam, "Seriously, are you still having nightmares about Jess?" It's all a ploy to get Sam to sit down across from him and look lovingly into his eyes. It works! Sam sighs, faces Dean, and confesses, "Yeah, but it's not just her, it's everything. I forgot, this job. Man, it gets to you." And it's dialogue like this that make me love my job. Listen, I subbed in for Al Lowe on an episode of Deadwood and I'll take Padalecki's ungrammatical grunts over Ian McShane's iambic pentameter any day. This show is a recapper's dream: 30 minutes of grunted dialogue, 15 minutes of walking around corners in spooky places, done.

The boys continue talking, and Dean tells Sam that he "can't bring it home like that." Sam is incredulous: "So, what, ah, all this? It never keeps you up at night? You're never afraid?" Dean answers "no" on all counts, and Sam spits out a sigh of disbelief before reaching over and pulling a huge knife out from under Dean's pillow. Dean still doesn't admit fear: "That's not fear, that's precaution." No, precaution is double-checking that you locked the door at night. Dean's cell phone rings and he furrows his brow before answering. We cut to a guy in a short-sleeved plaid dress shirt sitting at a desk and announcing, "Dean. It's Jerry Panowski." Cut back to Dean with the furrowing. Jerry reminds him, "You and your dad helped me out a couple years back?" Dean remembers, "Oh, right, up in Kittanning, Pennsylvania. The poltergeist thing." Ugh. Dean, why must you deliver such terrible lines? Jerry requests to talk with Dean in person, and I think we all know what Jerry wants. The Metallicar glides across the screen against a darkening Midwestern sky. The brothers and good ole Jer walk through some sort of factory while Jerry thanks them for getting there so quickly. Sam tries to make conversation with Jerry -- "Yeah, it was a poltergeist?" -- just as some malook walks across the foreground saying, "Hey, Poltergeist, I loved that movie!" You and the writers of this show both, Mr. Malook. I've got half a mind to send them a copy of The Turn of the Screw or something to at least vary this show's cultural touchstones. Jerry "The Geek" Panowski gives Sam his weekly dose of "No, Daddy really does love you" by telling him that his father was real proud and talked about Sam all the time. Then Dean gives Sam the first of this episode's meaningful glances. Sam's got a lot of medicine to take, it seems. The three are now walking by an airplane, so it looks like they are in a hangar. Jerry the Geek asks about their father, and Dean lies that he's "wrapped [up] on a job right now." Jerry then says brightly, "Well, we're missing Dad? We get Sam. Even trade," so that Sam can wallow some more: "No, not by a long shot."

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Supernatural

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