Oh. I forgot. They actually have one, don't they? The unsightly heterosexual snorfling cross-fades to the darkened art-studio section of Sam and Hooker Pumps's bedroom -- I'm guessing the art is hers -- before the camera pans over and across the bed, upon which our lovebirds slumber. She's on top of the sheets in a cropped t-shirt and a pair of those for-the-ladies boxer-briefs, by the way, and we get a lingering shot of The Ass That I Have Not Actually Been Waiting For, Thank You Very Much as she rolls away from him onto her side. The camera continues up to Sam's face -- he's depressingly clad in a grey t-shirt -- as a few unearthly groans hit the soundtrack, accompanied by the soft tinkle of shattering glass. Sam's eyes snap open at the latter, and he creeps out into the blackened depths of his nighttime apartment, angling around corners and darting his eyes between a swaying door and an open window before catching sight of a figure moving through one of the outer rooms. Sam slinks down the hallway, and when the intruder creaks open the glass door to the living room, Sam pounces. Sam-fu ensues. I wish I could be more specific, but the scene's so goddamned dark, all I can see is a pair of tussling silhouettes. Well, that and my own face reflected in the TV screen, but you're not here to read about that, I presume. After the two chop-socky each other into an adjoining room, the intruder finally slams Sam onto his back on the floor and Jensen Ackles's far-too-pretty face emerges from the apartment's pervasive gloom into the low light provided by the streetlamps outside to smirk, "Easy, tiger." Um. Mrow?












