Supernatural

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Drunken Bee: C | 1 USERS: B-
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The Hardy Boys and the Mystery of Genetics

Commercials. In a hotel room, John incredulously asks, "A vision?" Sam explains that this has happened before, and Dean jumps in, saying his brother used to get nightmares but now he gets them when he's awake. Sam thinks that the visions get stronger the closer he gets to the demon. John cranks, "When were you gonna tell me about this?" Both Sam and Dean look at their deadbeat father like, so we're really going to do it like this? Dean shortly responds that they didn't know what the visions meant. Daddy dopes, "Something like this happens, you pick up the phone and call me." Oh, it's on! Dean clunks down whatever he's fiddling with over in the corner and rushes past Sam to confront the asshole. "Call you? You kidding me? I called you from Lawrence. Sam called you when I was dying. Getting you on the phone, I got a better chance of winning the lottery." LOVE. Pained looks all around. John responds, like only the most boring of crazy men can, "You're right. Although I'm not crazy about this new tone of yours, you're right." How can I be so simultaneously outraged and bored to death? It's like every time John says something I halfway raise out of my seat, ready to go all Z-snap on the dude, but then fall back into the couch and doze off for a minute.

Sam reminds Dean and his father that the demon is coming tonight, and that Monica's family is going to go through the same thing they went through. John, from his comfily seated position, responds, "No they're not. No one is. Ever again." Let me repeat: the man is seated and seemingly not busy planning anything for this big fight tonight. Dare I note that he also seems simultaneously outraged and totally bored himself? Just sort of waiting to get killed off? Sam's cell phone rings. He picks it up, and it's Short Lip. Sam reminds us that the last time he saw her she fell out a seventh-story window. She asks to talk to John and Sam very poorly bluffs, "My dad? I don't know where my dad is." Who? My dad? This dad? I mean, no, not that dad? Dad? What dad are you talking about I don't got a dad in here with me, do I, Dad? Oops, I mean, "Dean." Short Lip tells Sam "it's time for the grown-ups to talk," and Sam hands the phone over.Short Lip says howdy and then introduces herself as "the one that watched Jim Murphy choke on his own blood." John bows his head. She tells him she's now in Lincoln, visiting another one of his friends. Short Lip walks over to a man tied to a chair and removes his gag and holds up the phone to his mouth. He starts, "John, whatever they do, don't..." and John recognizes that it's Caleb. The boys look alarmed. Short Lip says that "we" want the Guaranteed to Kill Anything Gun, and John plays dumb about it. Short Lip brightly says okay, but then slits Caleb throat off-screen and holds the phone up for John to hear Caleb gurgle and spurt. Whoa. Short Lip says that by taking the gun, John has declared war, "and this is what war looks like." John says he's going to kill her. What, by glaring dourly in her general direction? Short Lip tells him to mind his blood pressure, which...okay, hee. I was just about to remark on how lumbering and large and out of shape he seems for such a major demon hunter. Short Lip beat me to it. Her short upper lip must make it easier for her to crack one-liners. Short Lip tells John that "we're" going to kill anyone he's ever loved or befriended until he hands the gun over. John agrees. Short Lip gives him an address in Lincoln; John says it'll take him a day's drive, she tells him he has to get there by midnight that night. John says its impossible, but she insists, tells him to come alone, and hangs up. We get a really gratuitous shot lingering on Caleb's slashed throat as Meg asks the dead guy, "What the hell are you looking at?"

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Supernatural

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