Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 2 USERS: B-
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The Hardy Boys Are Not The Droids You're Looking For

There follows a lengthy scene between the two brothers, but because those brothers' names are not "Sam" and "Dean," I'll be cutting it down to the central point: The Ceiling Demon's been visiting Anson in his dreams, tutoring him on control of his power, and convincing him to use his power to reunite with his brother, even -- perhaps especially -- if that means killing anyone who did or would come between them, including the birth mother who abandoned them, the doctor who arranged for their separation, and the woman who would claim Andy as her own. Maybe. If they ever got married. And if both parties bought into that patriarchal crap about marriage equaling ownership of another. Andy does get in one good line when, flabbergasted at his twin's wickedness, he blurts, "You learn you got a twin? You call him up, you go out for a drink! You don't start killing people!" Heh. In any event, during all of this, Sam's shaken himself awake on the ground, and overhears the bits about The Ceiling Demon invading Anson's dreams to promise him, uh, riches untold, or something. Meanwhile, Dean's scampered up the surrounding hillside with a sniper rifle to take Anson out himself. Unfortunately for Dean, Anson -- whose mastery of his powers far exceeds that of his brother -- picks up on Dean's psychic energy, or whatever, and spins around from the argument he'd been having to telepathically smack Dean up with some mind-control mojo that forces Dean to press the muzzle of the rifle against the underside of his chin. Eeep! "Oh, please," Raoul sighs. "Like Dean's really going to blow his own head off. Get a grip, for Christ's sake." The camera cuts back to Anson as a shot rings out, but it's Anson who jerks around and drops dead to the ground. Andy snatched up Sam's automatic, you see, and blew a hole through the back of the twin brother he didn't know he had until about a half an hour ago. Tracy all-out freaks as Andy shakily lowers the gun right into...HEY! What happened to the METAL TEETH CHOMP!? We head into a commercial break, and there's no METAL TEETH CHOMP!? What the hell is this, A Very Special Episode of 24? Don't you dare fuck with what works, Kripke, or I'm-a have to head out to Los Angeles and CUT YOU.

The Impossible Dam. Impossible Aftermath. Impossible in part because of the dam itself, but mainly because it's already the next morning, and that has to have been the shortest night this program's seen since that fifteen-minute stretch between midnight and dawn during "Bugs." As the boys from the county coroner's office wheel Anson's bagged corpse towards an ambulance, Andy mind-mojos the sheriff's deputies into believing Anson shot himself. Uh. In the back. From five feet away. I'd insert some easy C.S.I.-related joke into the recap at this point, but I trust you can come up with one of your own. As Andy heads back to rejoin Our Intrepid Heroes, he pauses to catch Tracy's eye, but she hastily averts her gaze, still completely wigged from her experience the previous evening. Andy dejectedly bites his lower lip and continues on his way. "I never used my mind thing on her before last night," he admits to Sam and Dean, "and she's...uh. She's scared of me now." Dean uncomfortably looks away, allowing Captain Empathy to step forward, manfully yet sympathetically, and offer Andy his phone number, urging the once-blissful and now-tortured psychokinetic to call the boys anytime Andy feels the need. "What am I supposed to do now?" Andy bleats as Our Intrepid Heroes start walking away. "You be good, Andy," Dean instructs, "or we'll be back."

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Supernatural

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