Supernatural

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Drunken Bee: B- | 2 USERS: A+
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The Hardy Boys Need To Exfoliate More

Fade in on a leafy green street. The three get out of the Metallicar, and Dean assures Blondie that because he is "an officer of the law," it's fine to be breaking into a crime scene. They duck under the yellow tape, and Sam tells Blondie she can stay outside if she wants, but she says she wants to help. There's blood all over the place. Blondie starts to freak out a bit. Sam pauses time and runs to don his SuperSensitiveMan suit, comes back, and does his standard lowered-chin, soft-speaking thing. He asks Blondie if she can think of anyone besides her brother who might have done this. She can't really, but she does remember that somebody broke in and stole some of Zach's clothes a week before the murder. The police aren't suspicious, though, because the apartment is not far from downtown. Ah, yes, "downtown." Where all the crazy clothes-stealing robbers live. If I only had a nickel for each person I know who's had to move to the suburbs because all of their CLOTHES had been stolen in a rash of clothes-stealing break-ins due to their unfortunate proximity to "downtown."

Another "downtown"-related problem? The crazed jaws of violently barking dogs. Dean peeks out the front door at Cujo next door while Blondie sidles up behind him and remarks that the dog used to be sweet. Until it moved "downtown," that is. Actually, she says it turned mean right around the time of the murder. Dean returns to where Sam is looking at a photo of himself, Zach, and Blondie tacked up on the refrigerator, and tells Sam what Blondie mentioned about the dog. Sam wanks a bit about animals sensing paranormal activity and then smirks at Dean about how Dean is now as suspicious as Sam had been. Dean shrugs it off but nonchalantly suggests they take a look at the security tape to make sure. Blondie, working the "arms crossed in front of my tiny body tried-and-true method for appearing even tinier" pose, approaches Dean from behind. I have a feeling Blondie has more than just security footage she wants to share. Dean asks if she can get the security tape, and she says she already has it, having stolen it off the lawyer's desk. Pan in on the snapshot of Sam, Zach, and Blondie. And if Zach and Blondie are blood brother and sister, than Meatloaf is my identical twin. Dude looks like Luis Guzman. And as much as Luis Guzman equals GOLD, he's just not convincing as the older brother of some tiny Kirsten Cohen in training.

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Supernatural

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