Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: C | 1 USERS: B-
The Hardy Boys Toil and Trouble

Commercials. Dean sets up a night vision camera in the little boy's room. The little boy asks, "What do I do?" and Dean replies, "Just stay under the covers." Just take a minute to read that shit over again. I am not even presenting those lines out of context. Moving along, out of freaking Dylan Baker territory, the plan is that Sam and Dean will be in the next room keeping an eye on Hollywood via the camera. They'll wait until the witch starts sucking the life out of him to bust in and kill it. Fantastic. So, while I'm gingerly reaching into the gutter and trying to pick my mind out from among the collection of hairballs and Dunkin Donuts coffee cups, Dean is still sitting on a bed with a ten-year-old boy talking about what a "good shot" he is, and then asking, "Are you sure you want to do this?" SOMEBODY PLEASE DELIVER ME.

The brothers sit in the next room, waiting. Sam tells Dean that he's sorry. Dean looks confused and asks for what. Sam clarifies, "I know I've given you a lot of crap for following Dad's orders. But now I know why you do it." Just then, Dean notices something happening in Hollywood's room. Cut between Hollywood trembling in his bed as he sees the black-robed witch come in his room, the night vision video of this same thing, and Sam and Dean cocking their guns. No comment. Slowly, slowly, the scene progresses. The witch approaches Hollywood, and Dean makes Sam wait until it gets closer. Hollywood trembles, as boys do when strange things happen to them in bed. Or so my husband tells me. The witch leans over and starts sucking. Sigh. Just then Sam and Dean bust in and yell, "Hey!" which I don't understand. Since it's so important to catch the witch "in the act" if you will (SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME), why would they call its attention away? Anyway, they shoot it up, though it isn't feeding at all when they do so. It falls to the ground, and Dean slowly goes over to check on it. Pause, pause, pause, until we think it's probably dead, when NOPE! It zaps up and grabs Dean by the throat. It throws Dean against the wall, and in a nice effect it skitters across the screen in some sort of stop motion, knocking Sam to the ground and starting to strangle him. It leans in and starts sucking, and I just can't resist: "Hey, what's the witch doing sucking the life out of Sam?" Answer: "STARVING!" Ha ha ha. Dean does another "hey!" which, STOP IT DEAN! but for some reason this time when the witch looks at him and he shoots it, the shooting takes. Dean grunts, "You okay, little brother?" and then walks over to the dead witch and shoots it a few more times while it melts away. Dean calls Hollywood out from under the bed, and everybody gazes at one another, satisfied and spent. Not unlike most encounters between men and boys in seedy motels.

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