Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: D- | 1878 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys Are, Like, Stuck In This SUCKFEST

Homo Hacienda, Basement Division, and we have reached that point of this evening's dreadful presentation wherein the wickedly inclined one-off characters lecture and speechify at great length regarding their methods and motivations, so I'm gonna cut through all of the ensuing crap to provide you with what actually matters because this episode blows and I want to die, but more importantly because we still have nearly fifteen full minutes of show time left, and I'm on a deadline, so: Kitty, The Gay, and Imitation Of Sam were fucking around with the grimoire a month or two ago when the lights started to buzz and blink and flicker on and off, and Imitation Of Sam "went into this trance" during which he picked up a pencil and scribbled out a remarkably lifelike likeness of Dashing El Deano, right down to Our Intrepid Hero's delightfully off-kilter nose. When Imitation Of Sam finally came to, he told the others that a voice deep within his brain babbled the entire time about the bounty demons had placed on Dean's pretty little spiky-haired head, and how "every witch and Satanist across the whole country" was now in the running for the fabulous gifts of cash and prizes Hell's minions were offering in exchange for Dean's scalp. Imitation Of Sam then stumbled across the cunning plan of performing a body swap with Dean's brother in order "to go in, Trojan Horse-style," but now, according to The Gay, it seems Imitation Of Sam no longer has "the beanbags" to follow through with it all. Sam-In-A-Geek once more attempts to dissuade Kitty and The Gay from their current course of action, and while Kitty appears to waffle a bit, The Gay just presses his pissy little lips together and snits on over to snatch up the grimoire, flipping it open to the ominous-looking demon summoning spell he intends to use, as he's sick and tired of all this waiting around and would like to receive his fabulous gifts of cash and prizes right now, thank you very much. Kitty gapes, Sam-In-A-Geek squirms, and yours truly yawns, because it is beyond obvious at this point that The Gay's going to end up as chunks of Demon Chow long before this stupid, awful, evil, hateful, pointless, insulting, shitty episode finally -- FINALLY -- ends.

Supernatural

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