In any event, there you have it: The structure for tonight's flashbacks. And, admittedly, there are many amusing moments to be had this evening, but unfortunately, neither the voices used for the characters nor the device itself are consistently presented -- they shouldn't, for example, have those flashes of the meathead jock frat boy asshole's slow dance with the alien, for one, nor should we get that scene of the Trickster cavorting with his whores, for another, nor should we have had the entire opening sequence, for a third, and there are flashbacks wherein the dominant brother's supposed perspective is nowhere to be found -- so the entire episode just ends up being one great, big, sloppy mess. "One great, big, sloppy, GORE-FREE mess!" Raoul corrects, rightfully outraged at the waste of his time. Then again, I can't chide the overexuberant posters on the boards for indulging in unnecessary overanalysis if I'm going to do the same here, so let's just write this one off as a complete throwaway filled with manly, masculine fun and get back to the recap proper, shall we? "Indeed!"

So, where was I before the tangent? Oh, yeah: Sam makes with the pissy face and demands, "You never drank a purple nurple?" "Maybe that," Dean allows, "but I don't say things like 'feisty little wildcat,' and her name wasn't Starla!" "Then what was it?" Sam challenges, shooting his eyebrows skyward while pursing his lips all, "You ill-mannered, slovenly, thoughtless knave!" Dean, of course, can't remember. "But," he insists, more to redeem himself in Bobby's eyes than anything else, "she was a classy chick!" "Grad student," he continues, shooting the loser who failed to secure an undergraduate degree a nasty side-eye, "in anthropology and folklore. We were talking about local ghost stories." The camera's been slowly tightening its focus in around El Deano's head during all of that, which can only mean one thing: FLASHBACK!

Some smooth R&B hits the soundtrack as the camera pans up the shapely, svelte, well-put-together form of...an entirely different actress from the one they hired for Sam's version! Aw! Now I feel bad for making fun of that other woman's peasant face! At least when The X-Files did this story, they made Luke Wilson up to look like he was an inbred pea-brained moron rather than actually hiring an inbred pea-brained moron to play Mulder's version of the character! ...Ooops. "That's even less complimentary to the poor dear in Sam's version," Raoul notes. "You idiot." I meant...I mean...on Heroes with Niki...oh, fuck it. Elena Esovolova should have been given the opportunity to play both versions of The Girl In The Bar, okay? Jeez! ANY-way, El Deano James Bonds his way through a toast with Girl In The Bar Mark II, and after they've gently clinked their shot glasses together, the two suavely swallow their purple nurples. "My God!" Girl In The Bar Mark II marvels after a moment, gazing at Dean's face. "You are attractive!" And as several people on the boards have already noted, it's pretty damn amusing that that's the classiest compliment Dean can improvise to make his lady friend seem like less of a drunken townie skank and more of a sophisticated woman of the world in his version of the story. Not that, you know, any of us would do much better than that line were we ourselves staring into Jensen Ackles's eyes right after downing a couple of shots with the guy, but whatever. In any event, Flashback Dean is rather ridiculously urbane and self-possessed throughout the brief bit of dialogue that follows, in which he attempts to dissuade Girl In The Bar Mark II from matters carnal in favor of focusing on the case, but she throws herself at him anyway and draws him in for a long, lingering, sloppy wet one on the lips. Just then, Flashback Sam arrives, and as Jared Padalecki's way overdoing the prissy -- nay, the faggoty mannerisms, here, I'll be skipping past the asinine bit where his dialogue's reduced to a series of "Blah blah blah blahs!" in Dean's version of events to head back over to...